friends and families........

2011-09-22T13:15:00.002+08:00

i did it.

i finally officialised it on FB.

...............

alot happened in this few months.

drama, dissapointment, happiness, conflict...

i made 2 very important decisions this few months.

1 was to pick which paper i should take.

the other, was an internal struggle as to whether i wanted to do what any other reasonable person would hav done, or take up the challenge of being different and do what i would consider only a blinded immatured kid would do.

-------------------------------

when i first got my results, i was at the pit. i couldn't believe, yet i could believe that i got what i got.

i hid and ignored all my calls.

nobody made much sense that day but i'm grateful anyway. i was worried of how people will react when they hear of my results and what they will think of me. i am very self concious in that way :/

then i had to decide what paper to take.

i wanted to take a paer i am currently sitting for because i know i'll miss them ALOT if i am cut off totally from them.

then i wanted to take some papers i failed last sem because i know i can definately do it this time. and if i delay, i might not have the guts to face it next sem.

so i wanted to take 4 papers.

and damn, i got screamed/persuaded/threatened out of this idea, which, to everybody else, is as insane as saying i'm going to commit suicide.

took me 2 whole weeks to decide but i'm glad i made up my mind. it's tiring :/.

so i picked 3 papers. 2 that i failed and 1 more that i'm doing now :/

hope all goes well from now on, accademically. i'll probably do something stupid if it doesn't >< x(

----------------------------------------------------------

the second, was to decide if i wanted to end something i should have but did start or to go along with it.

no, it's not a full story, nobody knows the full story, and i'm not planning to tell anytime soon.

yes, there's this guy i thought was cute since waaayy long ago. i knew we had something but i wasn't sure, didn't believe it and didn't know what to do about it.

so yes, many things happened, alot of conflict and misunderstanding took place. mainly due to bad timing :/ maybe we just weren't meant to b with each other then

and anyway, i'm kinda glad some of this conflict took place. it took alot of doubts from me.

so yeah, we kinda expressed our feelings for each other in a blurred, rushed, very embarrassed manner.

it was mutual.

i didn't know what to expect or what to do about it. we talked it through, and cleared many misunderstandings but yet, there was something there, an internal struggle.

do i want to b with this guy? why? just because i feel something for him? i'm losing time with my friends if i'm with him and... it feels weired.

dont get me wrong, i really do like the guy. but i dont like having to give up on other things such as time with my other friends.

so i avoided him :/

he got emo when he saw me avoiding him. i think i made it quite obvious. it was totally unintentional though. and i melted, and was super nice to him that day.

GAAAHH.. what an annoying, problematic internal struggle.

THEN, before anything else happened, i found out he might b going UK.

that totally changed my priorities.

i told myself, i'll end this if he's going.

i stuck firm to my decision, but i couldn't bear asking him.

i finally did. after around 2 weeks.

he was very quiet and told me it's true. he might b leaving. then, he asked.. ''so can we still b close?''

i told him yes, cause things was still unconfirmed.

but i didn't make up my mind then if he really did leave, what would i do. whenever the question pops out in my mind, i ignored it.

so when it WAS confirmed that he was going, i was in a huge dilemma.

i realised i like him, ALOT.

i didn't want to go through the pain i been through with him again since the last hiccup.

but if i continued, wouldn't it be worst?

><

it took me 3 sleepless nights to figure it out.

there were many factors involved to consider.

i first decided i didn't want it because it'll be a burden to him and i didn't really think he could.

he told me enough to b able to trust him. and anyway, i wasn't afraid of being hurt anymore, hurt is as much part of life as happiness :)

then i doubted myself. that was harder to solve. but i decided :)

i'm going for it.

----------------------------------------------

he's gone already.

it's been 6 days since i last saw him.

everyday is pretty much a torture.... i actually dreamed he came back D: stupid dream.... but its getting easier.

atleast now i can predict when he'll be online and when i can chat with him. eventhough it means waking up at 5am :)

and no, i haven't got myself a skype account.

so yeah, officialised it ytd on FB. till now, the 'likes' went up to 59 and 27 comments. none from me.

i feel flattered that he is willing to change his FB status but there is a kind of pressure too and... there are other disturbing issues that follows it.

so yeah, for now, i'm not sure what is it i'm feeling for him and if he is worth this whole lot of sacrifice, but i do know that i get very happy just being able to msg him and getting his replies.

:)

2011-04-27T16:20:00.002+08:00

it's been ages since i last typed.

sometimes i think, is there still a point, blogging when i feel like it? i dont wish for people to read it yet, i hate having things all cooked up inside :(

it's been a unproductive and dissapointing day.

who am i? i keep wondering. i want to be the good natured person but i cant. i, but......

argh, forget it.

i'm just depressed.

dont mind me.

i am afterall VERY independent.

so independent in fact,

that when i reallly need or want people next to me,

they tell me,

"u ok?"

or

"she's very positive, u'll sort this out yourself, wont you , dear?"

and i'll just keep my mouth shut

my heart closed

and smile my happy confident smile.

i'm sorry if it's all messed up, i'm just typing anything that crosses my mind without arranging them :/ dont bother understanding them.

you wont.

2011-03-29T16:07:00.000+08:00

i have lots to say, as usual, but i dont know where to start :s

for 1 thing, i found out more about myself.
i like to know what i'm feeling,
understand why i'm feeling that,
and rationalise why am i doing what i'm doing.

so, i recently found out, to my surprise, i'm stuck in my comfort zone for far longer than what i would usually allow myself.
2-3 months maybe?
i've been so used to my group of friends,
i dont bother making new ones anymore!
which, i find, bothers me.
what happened to the enthusiastic me?
the person who gets herself a seat next to the new person in bus, shakes their hand, smile, and gives them a BIG 'hi~!!'???

recently, the bus is flooded with people.
my curiosity caught up with me.
awww... such interesting looking people!!
but i didn't feel like talking to them.
i just felt like getting my usual seat on the bus and doze off till i reach college.

'u're in u're comfort zone and u're too lazy to leave'
quote, my bro.

struck me hard in the face.
why? i wonder?
maybe i'm too tired.
i want my rest on the bus.

or maybe, like my bro say, i'm stuck.
comfortably stuck?

anyway, qiqi told me she found a girl in her class who is currently taking a degree in sunway who might solve our transport problem.
so, from then onwards,
i waont have to stay till 5.30pm
i wont have to wake up at 6am.
i wont have to reach home at 7pm.

but,
it felt weired.
a bit wrong actually.
i didn't like depending on people in the first place, that's obvious.
but,
i realise.
i just might be more attached to this jerking, late, problematic vehicle with all it's interesting people and UFO lights than i thought.
i didn't really feel like taking any other transport.

despite all it's disadvatages,
this bus actually helped me quite abit too.
i was able to go on9 during all my 'free time' while waiting to get on the bus at 5.30 ( since i dont get to go on9 at home)
i am able to relax as when i want after class.
i can go any where i want with my friends without my parents knowing as long as i appear to be taking the bus ;x
AND
if i have a car.
i'm not even sure if i can cope with my studies.
i think i'll go party, yumcha, movie, makan all day long.

i'm crazy and i know.

therefore, avoid temptation.
avoid car :)

oh, and i love my sleep in the bus ;)

oh oh, there was parent's lecturer's day!!
i went with my dad, the person who never agreed to my course :/
i told him i failed all my papers.
just so he's prepared.
he told me
'WHAT?! all FAIL??? no need to study edi la u!!'
=.=
why is it a surprise???
isn't that normal?? :(

anyway, met the lecturers.
all of them were pretty shock to see my marks.
since they have no idea what are the student's names, now do they mark our papers personally, they thought i was a studius, smart, good girl.

man, how wrong they were.

anyway...
i dont know what was it with me.
maybe i'm a little too confident for my own good but,
i convinced all my lecturers not to worry about me,
i know what i'm doing,
i know what to do,
and i'll pass all their papers....

GOSH!!!

wtheck??
why did i say that? *sigh*
i guess,
i just cant stand having people being worried about me :(

anyway, they've got enough to handle, right?
who needs another stupid, problematic student??

but yeah, i managed to fully convince my lecturer's AND my DAD that i'm okay.
my dad was actually pretty happy when we left ==
and when i told my lecturer i'm failing her paper this exam but CONVINCE her that it's ONLY because there was too little time and i'll be great, she smiled and said okay
....
she's okay with me failing her paper??!!
i salute to my own talent in convincing people xP
or maybe they are just too trusting :/

i even told my dad i'm glad i'm a regular fail-er
makes me a stronger person =.=
builds character.
and he bought it =.=

that's all peeps.
gotta go study.
exam tmr.
have to live up my 'expectations'
haih...

GAMBATEH~~!!!!
ciao~~ :)

ps, despite what happened exactly 2 weeks and 1 day ago, i'm doing well. still get emo at times, feel myself getting more vulnerable in this sense but i think i'm speedily recovering :D one of my friends told me even after 2 years, she still misses her ex once in a while. so i guess i'm normal and on the right track. i actually find it better for me when i talk to him instead of avoiding him :s wonder why's that?

2011-03-23T12:56:00.002+08:00

past few days have been quite happy ones. it felt very 'full'? like i spent my days well, not wasted any time :)

went midvalley with pc, becca, selva and another neighbour of becca's. sorry! i kinda forgot the name >.< oh well, it's been SUCH a long time since i saw pc and becca, was quite excited. then again, there's this guilty feeling poping in and out once in a while for not having told my mum about this outing x( i'm a bad girl

oh, 'rango' was abit of a disappointment. i thought it'll be funnier.

oh, and we went window shopping!!! :D i was sooo sorely tempted to buy the blouse and the crop- top from cotton on. thank goodness pc told me it looked kinda old and that i was abit out of cash. when i went to pyramid to look at the same blouse again on monday. i didn't like it very much and my friend with me told me it looked abit old too.

i buy on impulse :x

which is why i dont go shopping alone, cause i'll buy alot of junk i end up not wearing. AND i've been trying to control myself ==

stupid girl next to me now ==
have to go for lunch ==
bye for now!! :D

ps. i'm quiting fb for a week!!! dont msg me :)

2011-03-16T10:42:00.003+08:00

i've always been the kind of person, who likes to sit in the most deserted area in the room and just observe people around me without being noticed.

i liked doing that. lost in my own thoughts, making my own assumptions, just.. thinking. or maybe that's just a pathetic excuse i made up for myself for never being in the midst of things. i sometimes feel uncomfortable being in the spotlight.

in the past months, i lost traits of that. i didn't care where i sat anymore, as long as the right people are with me, i dont care if i'm being 'watched'.

recently however, i find myself falling back into the same patterns. when i'm in the library, i start noticing who are the people around me, who are walking past. i forgot doing that in a long time. but now i'm back to the old habbits.

thanks to a certain someone.

that certain someone used to pop up right next to me unexpected and see what i'm doing. few times, i was caught totally off guard and i was blogging.

for 1 thing, i hate having people i know next to me when i blog, cause things i blog are usually quite personal and although i dont mind people knowing, i'm not the type who goes around telling people, 'hey!! go read my blog so you can know whether i'm emo or not now!!'

for another, nobody in college knows my blog url. ( or so i thought, chill~ i'm not mad or anything, i knew it was just a matter of time )in the beginnig, i didn't want anybody in college to know about my blog was because it was a new beginning to me. college is a new start. for me to become who i want to be. i did not want people to compare and see how different i was from what i am. then, slowly, when i really started blogging to express myself, i realise i didn't want my friends in college to read my blog.

i see my friends everyday. they tell me things about themselves, they complain, and gossip. i listen, i give my opinions, and i join in. however, one thing slightly different between me and my friends are that, i hide my emotions... well.

everybody has times when they hide how they feel, but not everybody are sucessful. when i go out for walks, it's obvious i'm not in my best mood. but sometimes, even when i'm laughing with them and telling jokes, doesn't always mean i'm in my best either.

you won't know me unless i let you.

i think, for me, i dont want to worry my friends or spoil the day or mood for my friends, that's why i either walk off, or just hide my feelings.

so anyway, yeah, after being caught off guard a few times, i am now back to my old, constantly-alert-of-surrounding-mode.

and... it hurts.

i knew i had something for him and i let myself. i dont think he owes me anything like an apology or explaination cause, there was nothing official there, to begin with. so there's nothing to be upset too, i guess :)

there, my first smiley since monday. it felt wrong typing a smiley, but i'll be okay :) i just need to let go...

too bad letting go isn't what i do best. took me a full 18 months to forget the last guy i had a mere crush on. i wonder how long is this gonna take? maybe if i try hard enough i can do it in a month :D

ps, doing things to make me happy when i'm upset doesn't help in the long run, it distracts me but it doesn't solve the problem. that being said, i always appreciate what my friends do for me when i am in states like that.

pps. seriously, i'll be okay :) i dont fall for people easily. and i still dont believe i have. there's just this little bit of feelings there that i will definately wipe off with time :)

the past

2011-03-15T16:32:00.002+08:00

every second u're using is going to be your history. time passses the same for all of us. it's just what happens around us that makes us feel as if time passes faster or slower.

for me, any time i'm NOT daydreaming, with people, listening to music i like or watching a show is time passing slowly.

then, there are times when, even though time passes slowly, a sudden change in events or a shock can make EVERYTHING suddenly feel so distant.

since the last time i blogged.quite alot happened actually. always wanted to blog it but hadn't the time or i had someone close by.

feels like another decade ago now...

last week, i lost my mechanicle pencil. quite upset about it. it was with me since secondary school. blue, smooth, withstand dropping, and just the right feel.

then, on tuesday, suzanne called me out for lunch. pleasent surprise. it was ages since i saw her. she's as pretty and easy to get along as ever.

after class, pig gave me a lesson. a driving lesson. in eva's SERENA. huh, figured i'de never be one of those who'll need lessons after getting my license. however, due to constant reminder from my mum that my license was 'bought', i kinda lost my guts to drive. but it's kind of cool to think that the first car i drive after getting my license, is a huge MPV. ha!!

on thursday. i got ffk'ed. i wont say i was happy about it because i wasn't. kinda left me in a emotional state. i sent a message to amy, askig if she wants to go to the night market. i dont know what was i expecting, a 'no'? it was like a desperate act to show that nothing was turnig out for me that day, i guess. what a sadist.

to my utter surprise, she said 'ok de'... she made my day. just like that. but we didn't go to the night market, she wasn't keen, went to her house for dinner instead. her family was, as usual, more friendly than any average families.

we talked.

actually, she talked. i listen.

i kind of forgot i used to talk alot. i used to be the one searching out others to listen to me. now, i serch out others to talk to me.

she said i have no standing of my own. cause i dont seem to have any opinion, whatsoever... maybe it's true... now?

on friday. went taylors. bought a cake for vivien in pyramid, her b'day being the next day. alot of great memories that day. memories that were so gret, they seem like they were plucked from a dream... and they might just as well stay that way...

woke up cring on saturday. high fever. went to lok yee's house later that day, and her mum tried to drunk me with cocktails one after another.

baking on sunday. a success. but, i'm not in the mood to celebrate. mainly cause....

monday. shock. denial. emo. internal struggle.

sorry peeps. i still cant get myself to type all this out. the shock, the struggle, isn't gonna leave as soon as i want it.
:(

oh, i failed f6

history :(

2011-03-10T17:15:00.002+08:00

everything feels so familiar.

the lies. the gradual distance. the akwardness. the gossip. the hidden truth. the complicatedness.

when there are cracks in a relationship, there are signs.i just hope it recovers soon enough :(

yeah, i'm emo. failed my law progress test.Badly.
quarelled with my mum yesterday.
rejected an outing i would have loved to go, but got ffk'ed to another outing i was anticipating which was also the reason i rejected the first.

gosh, why am i complaining?
i'm such a whimp :(

uh huh~

2011-03-07T10:50:00.003+08:00

i twisted my leg.

during the first half an hour of my free taekwondo trail class. apparently, i look so dead/lifeless, i was constantly approached by random people from the class to check whether i was alive >.< mostly the instructor though. guess he was worried to lose a student :x

it's all about me me me me me~

2011-02-25T09:44:00.002+08:00

know the song 'it's all about him him him him him'? dont ask me who sang it. i have no idea :) but it's such a catchy song, i cant get it off my mind! x)

ok, well, sorry for the late updates :( i try to make it a point to blog once a week. but it's not an easy habit to grow ( since there's fb constantly distracting you there >_< )

picking up frm last week :)

thursday.
SNOWFLAKES!!!! again -.- i'm kinda getting bored og snowflakes. i used to love grassjelly series, but now, i prefer soya ice :) love soya! xD

anyway, i went snowflakes for a round of girly chat with 3 other classmates who used to be in the next class. so yeah, it's new friendship blooming in the right direction :)

so, as i was saying, i was full of anticipation to break the ice with them when i saw HILLARY WEE!! if i spelt correctly, the genius.

on usual circumstances, i would be more than glad to have him bring his bowl of best seller to sit on the next table and start a conversation. but it wasn't normal circumstances that day!! T-T i want to chat with the girls!!! :(

friday.
daddy's b'day :) dinner date!!! spend rm 80 ++ ><

oh, haha, sorry to wanqi xP i'll try not to be late again!! ><

sat and sun.
nadaaa~~ *it's all about him him him him him*
nervous ><
oh, amy's bbq party. the b'day girl turned up so late x.x but i'm glad to see her anyway :)

OH!!! i forgot! something DID happen on sunday. PM me for more details ;)IFyou want it

monday.
results day. freakin nervous i tell youuuu~~ >< x.x x(
i was sooo worried. i honestly wouldn't know what would i have done if i failed even 1 paper. commit suicide maybe? and i'm serious. i might. :x
i cant imagine having a whole 6 months just studying 1 or two papers... WITHOUT my friends. the thought of it, puts me in despair.
having so much free time.. not seeing my friends.. not attending class together.. my mum's grumbles...her disappointment...

but i didn't

cause i PASSED!!!!

i have NO IDEA how i passed. sheer luck, i still believe. i dont know what's wrong with me, i want to pass so badly, but i dont believe i can and even after i passed i still haven't accepted the fact that's i'm an ACCA student. even after so many days.

Tuesday.
damn embarrassing. i dont even wanna talk about it.

wed, thursday.
nadaaa~~~ day dreaming away *and we dont give a dang dang dang dang dang*

i have so much to tell. but my test is next week!!! >< ciaos~~

ps. :( so sad.. din get to go eat korean food with becca and po chi :X
*about nobody-e-e-e-e*

happy~

2011-02-16T12:45:00.002+08:00

recently went out aloottt~
but the happiest had to be the dinner at padi with the girls <3
there was awkwardness,
i wont deny,
but,
it's a beginning :)

the other would be the gathering with my ex-classmates~!!!
5@11 born-for-this
haha,
haven't said that before...
always referred to them as 'my form 5 classmates'
it was a LITTLE too wild for my liking
but it was great :)
we rocked xD
went 100 degrees then to music zone where the REAL party started x)

FINALLY went bai nian ytd~~!!!
so sad :(
only 4 person
oh well, good enough.
gamble non-stop ==
lost 10 bucks leeeehhh~~ ><

valentine this year came and went quietly.
out of boredom,
i ran to the over-priced bookstore in college and bought CHOCOLATES~~!!! xD
free chocolates for single ladies!!! ;)
gave them all out :P
oh, a delivery guy came in to deliver a rose to another guy in our class!! ha!
so cute, the guy was soo shy, i bet he was blushing ;p

5 days to go....
i'm soo dead ><
please pray for me x(

that probably sums things up for now,
till the next week. ;)
CIAO~ xoxo

ps. these guys HAVE to work harder -.-

to BECCA

2011-02-16T12:43:00.001+08:00

i DO NOT LIKE ur NEW BLOG AT ALL x(

yeah~!!

2011-02-07T10:36:00.002+08:00

changed my templates AND got my chatbox back!!! :D thanks to a little help, of course ;)

oh yeah, soo... todays the 5th day of CHINESE NEW YEAR ^^

it's a bad day to start work -.-

oh well, i'm studying anyway, not working, so it wont affect me .. right?? :)

oh.

I WANT TO BAI NIAN!!!

so bored :(

this year didn't go friends house... AT ALL

>:(

last saturday, i went station 1 to meet amy and jj after having dinner at aunt ivy's house,

they were drinking when i reached there.

amy made me drink 1 glass,

claiming it helps cure sore throat.

NOT TRUE~!!

i'm still having sore throat taday~ ><

anyway, it tasted horrible.

took me 3 glasses of ice to down that 1 tiny glass of heinekein -.-

my mum's super sensor nose detected alcohol the MINUTE i reached home.

DA DA * loud sound that you hear in game shows when someone answers a question wrongly*

my mum blacklisted amy and jj.

just like that! x(

had an argument with her on that.

thus, the next day, when amy ask me out for a movie....had to reject :(

they told me the story from THEIR point of view.

i found it reasonable.

maybe there was somethings i didn't know...

or wasn't told.

still keeping an open mind about this.

but now,

i know

what i hope would come true

might never come true again.

2011-01-28T11:09:00.002+08:00

i'm not doing enough

i'm doing too much

i should be doing more

i should just shut up

i'm sorry. :( i really am.

2011-01-26T14:33:00.002+08:00

out of boredom, i read 70% i think of the notes posted by this fb user on horoscopes. it's amusing how they think everybody can be categorised into 12 group of people :-/ but i'm not denying that i found mine quite true o.O but i dont think it'll work on some of my friends. it's all boils down to whether u believe it or not.

but then again, those daily horoscope thingy? take it with a pinch of salt. they are almost never true. but maybe that's only for me.

you know in some countries, where they have these tv programmes and there will be a 'gypsy' or 'magician' or people like that hosting the progrmme saying things like

'i am now casting a magic upon you...'
*eeriee music*
'lfkhdjkjf.....' *host mumbles something*
'now, tommorow, you will recover from your sickness!!/ ur loved ones will recover from their sickness!!/ something unexpected will happen to you!!'
(or anything else equally dramatic)

next day...

host: ' we are receiving a call from a caller.'
stupid caller 1:' OMG!!! it really WORKSSS!!!! i was sick for a whole week! and after hearing ur program, i recovered!!! '
stupid caller 2: ' i never did believe in this kind of thing. but today, something really UNEXPECTED happened! my boyfriend proposed to me!!! i am soo glad i listened to ur program last night'
..........etc etc etc

and the list goes on.

are you really telling me you believe that??
do you know how many people propose to their loved ones everyday?
do you know how many of these people watch that particular program the night before their boyfriends proposed?

ALOT i tell you.

now, i'm glad to say, things like that lessened, cause people are smarter now.

anyway, things like that are similiar to horoscopes.

just because one person says it's true. it doesn't neccesarry means it's true.

:)

just a thought.

happy~

2011-01-19T12:28:00.002+08:00

i'm a happy girl today :)

i have 3 dear friends who i'll be seeing later :)

one of them just left :)

and i had a fantastic time chatting with her :)

i'm just waiting for the second and the third :)

the second is going pyramid with her college mates :)

i haven't seen her in ages :)

i'm excited to get her sms to tell me she reached pyramid so i can find her :)

the third is a person currently appearing quite alot in my life :)

i have no idea what sort of relationship is this.. ._.

but i look fforward to seeing this person who promised to come :)

although it is way pass the time this person promised to come :)

i'm positive :)

therefore. :)

i'm a happy girl today :)

am blogging because my class starts at 3pm and i'm bored of FB :/

2011-01-12T13:10:00.002+08:00

happy BELATED new year people~!!! xD

since i'm bored. i'll just summarise to myself what happened in 2010. ( since no one else probably knows this blog exist -.- )

i took up CAT course in sunway-Tes on slight impulse, suffered tremendously, passed and failed alot of papers, developed ege bags that wouldn't go away and got sick 3 times this year. that probably summarised it all.

but aside from that, i met fantastic people. during my first few months, i stuck close to a certain few people. i thought they were the kind of people i'm looking for. there was plenty of drama, and i wouldn't say i enjoy being part of it.

then, the second half of the year, boredness and longing for proper company as well as these people's awesomeness brought me close to another group of people. they not pretty, not fun, not glamorous but they are fun, sensitive, studius and happy.

how could i ever missed these people in my class who were just so plain awesome and made myself miserable from all that drama?

we chat, we play, we pranked, we go for outing, we cried, we studied and we cared for each other. i'm lucky they were able to accept me in so quickly, however, we seldom sms or chat on fb. basically, we meet and have fun. they sms each other alot, but i was seldom in the category as i was constantly out of credit. T-T but i wont complain, cause i ont c it as much of a problem. some friends are best kept for sms only, and some are meant for keeps :)

then, nearing the end of the year, in came another group of people whom i did not have the honour to remember all their names yet but they were kind and we enjoyed chatting and gossiping. BUT, some of them are not as easy to accept new commers as others and it took me awhile longger for me to know them and for them to know me.

i actually enjoy these processes x) they make me feel like i'm expanding my small world bit by bit and is seeing more of this world.

now, what would college life be without a guy or two to spice it up? ;) Notice i said SPICE? yeah, keep it that way, spicing things up and getting myself into a round of drama are 2 different things. i've seen enough drama to last me for a year. oh wait, it's a new year already, erm...i think i can take a bit more of drama this year ;D but seriously, there is this one guy, whom i wont mind being with :x ... if he is brave enough and know the right thing to do of course >< but i always wonder what is it that they see in me? or are they totally blind and just plain bored?

hmm, what else, guys, friends, studies.... ahhh, family :/

pretty uneventful. but my mom was SOOO cute xD the way she reacted when she saw my college mates? i'll remember it for life :)

i think... with time, my relationship with pc actually got better o.O despite not seeing each other often ( but we call ALOT ) and there's this slight changes. i realise i'm more of the person who consults than the person who goes to get consulted when i'm with pc now o.O wonder how that happened :-/ but other relationship like with, hl, becca,wq, jq, amy,jj,ying....has all either improved or maintened. except 1 particular person, of course :'( really upset about it still

as for me, i'm more of a shopoholic than ever~ but i still have bad taste. i buy on impulse so often! ><

that's about it~~!! till next time

xoxo, you know you <3 me~^^

REVIVE~!!!

2010-11-07T11:45:00.002+08:00

isotonic :P

anyway, since i am left stranded in college today, i had time to do a lot of reviving. example, my blog and a long forgotten place, frienster.

sounds like a real strange wort now, doesn't it. but if you could remember, msn and frienster were only as common as facebook was when we were in secondary.

so what happened?
1. facebook came
2. facebook ruled
3. facebook was more fun
4. frienster was damn outdated

it took me a while to recall my password. when i logged it, it seem like a whole new world. the picture that looked back at me in the display pic was so.. weird. i dont know, it just, dosn't feel like me, ya know?

the picture were so kiddish, so 'act cute', so childish. it was like from another dimension. my features didn't change much, but the way i try to look cute in front of the camera lens, is enough to send shivers down my spine.

and there it was, an album title that once made me feel warm n snugly. i cant believe what happened to it. i cant believe how much tears and heart break it caused...no, actually, i can believe how much tears and heart break it'll cause.

i knew it the minute i decided i want them to be my buddies.

i knew it the minute we promised we'll make each other our brides maid on our wedding day.

i knew it when we started sharing a diary.

i knew it when we made fun of each other and i still wanted to be friends even though they do not understand me and often hide at home crying at what they thought were jokes but i didn't.

but i did not know we'll ever have this situation.

i didn't know things will turn out this way.

i didn't know the bbq party we were having together will be our last.

i didn't know the whipped cream fight we had at every birthday will come to an end.

i didn't know we would never have any more sleep overs.

i didn't know the first baked cheese cake she ever baked for her, will also be the last.

i didn't know we'll never have chance to cam whore like crazy till we didn't have time to do anything else.

i didn't know i'll one day stare at these pictures and type a sad bog post about it.

....

now,

how am i gonna get 4 people who laughed at me and yet try to teach me to play mah jong for new year?

how am i gonna get that baked cheese cake you promised to bake for me?

how am i gonna have the chance to ever tell you guys, how very much i love you guys..

********************

why am i always typing about sad stuff? that people i care for are going away?

dont blame me for fighting on maintain-ing this relationship. i care and want it back too much to bother about your opinion on this.

i don't believe we'll end like this

hard to understand feelings

2010-08-20T10:29:00.002+08:00

i used to have a great friend i always worry about. worry about her studies, worry about how she coping with all the bad luck she's having.

it's a mixed feeling really. i feel mad at her, but happy for her yet confused with a touch of jeolousy. and have you ever wondered why is jeolousy spelt as jeolousy? case it's a 'lousy' feeling.

she has the worst luck i've ever seen in anybody. but yet, as i told her, she is also the strongest person i know. therefore, i truely think she deserves the happiness she is having now, it's the least fate could do for her.

her studies were never fantastic, but now, when i ask, she'll happily tell me of how she is a fast learner and passed all her papers.

she used stick to herself. sitting quietly at 1 corner doing her stuff wheen no one talks to her. when i ask her to mix around, she ask me why should she do that? "they want to talk, talk la, i what also ok de. whatever la."

she used to tell me stories of how popular she was in her old school. but now, she doesn't tell me anything anymore because she's too busy.

she used to say how she sometimes felt like dying or the quarrels she had with her mom. i bet now, she'd give anything to live another day in her happy college life.

she used to call me, and we chat for hours. now i when i call her, it lasted only 12 minutes, with me left on the other end of the telphone line feeling hollow on the inside. it was the longest 12 minute phone call i ever had.

and i?

i loved hthe carefree-ness she had

i loved the spark of self confidence she had once in a while

i loved the way she bully guys

i loved the way she talk

i loved the way she would glare and dare people to hit her back

but...i also started to hate the few people who dumped her and talked bad about her during her tough period for her when i dont even have people i hate myself.

:(

i miss her very very much.

she is now a pretty, confident, briliant and most of all a happy girl of 17. and one of the main causes that helped me release myself from facebook addiction because everytime i go online, she's there posting happy pictures of herself and her friends which reminds me greatly of what's happening.

---------------------------

i'm pissed off about the fact that she is totally disconcerned about me to not even feel happy when i called and told me that i changed to be so 'luo suo' when the fact is that the person who changed the most, is her.

i'm pissed off about the fact that, when she wanted to forget her past because it's so painful, she left me behind, someone she used to call a friend she trust.

i'm pissed off about the fact that she told me she didn't contact anybody from secondary school. but i see her chatting with the exact people she made me hate for a period of time in secondary even if they are now in the same college she's in.

i pissed off at how she did not even care to spend a few minutes of her many facebook hours to drop by my wall n just post a 'hi' or 'hey, no worries, i still rmb you'

and most of all, i pissed off at the fact that i was wrong when i told myself, "this girl and i, we are going to go a long way in the future" . or maybe i wasn't, i've no idea. but i cant believe that this post, is going to officially be the most tear inducing post to type since i started it. and i'm typing this in college library, those people must think i'm nuts. but like i said, it was unexpected.

i guess now i dont have to decide who to dump, my bro or her on 31st of oct to celebrate a special day.

wonder if i'll ever ask her to read this. guess she wouldn't read it even if i had. she's too busy, plus she doesn't like philosophy. she'll say, 'aiya, whatever la'

to this friend of mine:

like you said, whatever la. if i continue being upset or emo about this, i'm gonna sound like a total dumped-ex-lover, which is purely disgusting, being the fact that i'm a really normal girl.

lets be happy. i'll learn to accept that you might not care for me as a friend as much as i do. but it'l be alot easier if you could help me with it. what do you say? xian? *hugs*

i'm BORED

2010-07-22T11:11:00.002+08:00

it's not boredom from nothing to do, it's more like boredom from being stuck at the same phase of my life for the past few months.

for knowing how much i could have done in the past but couldn't do anything about it any more.

for realising now that being cool, isn't really that cool.

for realising now how much i miss being able to chat without worries to people i care instead of having to comfort them about things like every-things-ok-with-your-relationship ( irony considering the fact i was NEVER in a relationship )

for suddenly realising people you dont use to care so much about might mean alot to you in the future.

for suddenly realising how much of myself i lost in the process of trying to be someone i wanted to be.

for having to be nice to people who hated me from the begining of the year because of a small minor error in what i said because i want to mend it

for feeling like i had left out on one of the most fun periods in my life which i could have enjoyed but was to lazy to enjoy it or was plain lazy.

for having to put up a i'm-fine-and-am-not-emoing when i am obviously emoing

for having to deal with other's love problems on almost every call i get

for having to deal with everything myself when i am emo because i cant bear to tell anyone else and ruin thier perfect image of the happy me because they depend on me for comfort

but mostly

for feeling like a total pathetic loser i am feeling now.

which is why,

if you guys at college ever reads this since none of you knows my blog

will understand the reason why i never told about my blog.

nice way of putting it, i care too much.

bad way of putting this, i love myself too much.

gosh, i cant tell all of you who were once my school mates how much i missed you guys.... even though i never been to any trips with you in the past or bothered to talk to you in the past. those feelings i longed for in the past was there because you guys were there. all of you. no matter how long was it since i last contacted you or how many topics we share.

love you guys. and will continue loving all of you in this dead blog not many people know about.

becca- u better call me SOON. or i swear i'll.....do something UNTHINKABLE :x

po chi - somebody promised to call me on 21st of july? o.O

sheou jun-

and loads of other people whom i wont bother to label here since they either

1) doesn't know i have a blog

2) dont bother to read

3)never bother about this small homosapien who owns this blog

anyhow, i'd really enjoy a nice notification on my fb that somebody misses me. ( instead of the usual 'somebody tagged you in a photo' )

dont mind the fact i sound pethatic in this post -.-

wooohooooo~

2010-07-11T17:35:00.002+08:00

sorry ppl ( if there r still any ppl out there who realise i own a blog and have NOT forgotten about it ), abandoned blog for more than 4 months already. time i dug it back up and start typing x)

4 months is a long period of time. the last time i blogged, i haven't even finished my first round of finals and was fretting over wether i will pass T1 and T2. ( stupid thought -.- i mean.... do smart ppl like me FAIL easy exams that only require u to click your chosen answer into the computer? DUH!!! of course they do. why else do you think i'll FRET??? )

now, lets see where in my many stages of life i am in now.

i passed my T1 and T2 *screams of joy in the back*

i sat for my T3, T4 and T5 (yes, i studied, cried, slept, fret, ignored exam, stressed for 3 months before the exam... [ not that THAT many ppl knew or BOTHERED to know if i did] )

i got a job, credits to ellie :) whom i bet doesn't know her name is appearing on a blog she doesn't even know exists. i earn 80 bucks a day selling 3 weeks of kiwi and 1 week of 'safeggs'. the eggs were a stupid thing -.- i mean, who would pay 1 BUCK to buy eggs ppl CLAIM to be PASTURISED and has ADDED DHA???!!! ( 'claimed' meaning they MIGHT have but i have no idea if they are telling the truth ) anyway, you don't want to see me on a court case for sabotaging other's business, do you? so i'll just drop it at that. but kiwi was SOOO fun! i get to meet 'safegg' promoters who all turn out to be pretty cool ppl cause we work same days ( meaing i won't be all lonely and start talking to the na bet supervisor who took a liking to me because i sold all his kiwi stock and broke their record ) and they are all newbies so i get to act like a total you-guys-have-no-idea-how-to-do-it-right-so-worship-me-and-i'll-teach-you sucker! Lol, it lasted only a few seconds for every promoter i meet, but i love to think of myself as a MEANIE x) guilty pleasure ;P nyway, i'll be glad to leave, ( after supposingly 8 days but worked another 2 extra days as a extra favour AFTER i supposingly resigned ) since the staffs are SO friendly to me now, they even tickle me! x.x

i meet a few interesting characters that i found joy in chatting with. these characters go by the name of alvin liu something and colin something. i actually felt closer to alvin, whom i've only knew a few hours, than my colledge mates whom i knew for MONTHs. ( but nothing beats chatting and spilling things and teasing and getting teased and gossiping and having fun with u guys whom my life used to spin around when i was in secondary school. cheers. ;'])

i read, harry potter series, pendragon, and some other books my mom randomly borrowed from PJ library.

i stayed at hospital KL for a night. ( to look after my grandma who went for a minor operation which did NOT take place in the end ) fantastic experience i tell you, but not necessarry in the good way.

i 'supposingly' switched my phone and 'supposingly' gave my brother my old phone. but i loved my old phone too much, there were too many sweet messages which i kept from ppl i cared there that could not be transfered. i hadn't the heart to give it away :'(

i am watching 'vampire diaries' and 'gossip girls' ( gaaahhhhh~ i asolutely LOVE Chuck. ignoring the fact that he's a totally spoilt rich bastered who is immensly annoying when he is emo, he a GREAT boyfriend...... i cant believe i'm saying this, he's not even cute! )

i gained x-kg. ( becca!!! u said you'll come here n we'd go jogging together x( come on! i need to get my butt off my comfy bed )

i went and came back from a family trip to cambodia :)

i went and came back from a class trip to genting.

i was officially hated by 2 girls in my class whom i used to look up to because of something i innocently joked about in the BEGINING of my first semester. ( 3 actually, but 1 of them is currently a friend )

i currently support SPAIN after argentina loss 4-0 to germany ==

my 2 girl friends whom was with me since beggining of sem is currently dating my 2 boy friends whom was in the gang since begining of sem leaving me, a loner, sitting between 2 couples in the cinema. ==

oh,

and of course, there's the part about my long-ago-crush-whom-used-to-set-my-heart-fluttering who finally realised that he likes me == took him quite a while :( but like i said, 'used to' i'm not sure i still like him as much anymore

i wont bother you with the mushy details i'm sure u're not interested in. furthur details? ask me out to yam cha! or call me out!

so long, cheers ppl :)

updates!!!!...finally

2010-03-19T10:57:00.002+08:00

am currently blogging at Sunway University College library and is panic'ing while feeling guilty as it is less than 24 hours to my CAT, T1 and T2 exam but not doing anything about it.

somebody...MOTIVATE me!!!! >.< scream at me, pinch me, annoy me, bug me...help!!! lazy girl in serious need for motivation

so, back to main purpose. UPDATES.

apparently, i haven't updated in more than a month. too lazy to type 1 month's stuff now. just random nice stuff :)

---------------------------------------------------

22nd Feb

class party!!
organised by Eli.
suggested by Ms Geetha.

everyone was required to bring sth. lazy me brought chips. x)

really really nice food contributed by class mates, rated by me. ( sorry if the food you brought is not rated here x.x )

rice balls-yee lynn
i tell you, theserice balls were so nice! and no wonder, her sister who came back frm a student exchange program in Japan thought her how to do it. :)

KFC (lol) - kai liang, zhen hui, zhan ping and jeremy
haha, they rushed off to pyramid to buy it after class. xD the fried chicken was the first to be cleared off!

potato, egg, cucumber salad- Jesseca
potato lover!!! >>>me explains it all, doesn't it? ;)

baked mash potato-Elizabeth
same as above. a true potato lover

apple pie- Daniel o.o
so pleasantly shocked that this guy can BAKE. WTH, i'm terrible. btw, the pie was really good. RECIPES!!!!

Choc chip cookies- vivien and vi ven
another pleasant surprise and a shock to my self esteem. gosh....are people born with baking abilities or what? cause i definately dont have it :(

some really nice i-dont-know-what-made-with-vege - by cassey
lol, ka may's a lucky girl ;)

PS: i pop'ed the bottle of sparkling juice! and shocked the guy on the first floor who's talking on the phone xP the first time in my life. it's fun :)

----------------------------
28 Feb

go wan qi's house
determined-to-go-to-her-house me dumped alone to talk to her mom while she watches TV and ate a 3-hour dinner.

------------------------------------------
1st March

sudden debate competition
CSB lesson ( comunication-sth-sth... it's english ) turned out to be a debate competion. i tell you... Ming Sung is a total crappin idiot. x(

he practically interupted all my speeches with craps. something about, wait... pornography??

the title,
advantages against disadvantages of the internet.

most teachers above 30, will definately vote for it's disadvatages.
unlucky me x.x

no results were anounced. i thought we did ok, and casey was really good, so was ka may!!! teacher praised them too...and me x)

we shoke hands after that. no hard feelings... right?

-------------------------------------------------
6 March

laughed and watched a movie after crying and nearly jumping off the roof-top of sunway college. yup, i failed BOTH me exams by 1 mark EACH. maddening.

never managed to convince myself i was gonna be good at accounts...
ps. solomon kane is the MOST violent movie i've ever watched. Ying even cried watching.
----------------------------------------------------

8th March

not being an avid(is there such word?) facebooker, i didn't see the notification for exam resits to bad-no-good-at-accounts-thus-failing-exam-students. saw only on the same morning as the resit exam.

dont even dare to imagine my results. ==

'tumpang'ed douglas' car back. :) thanks. was stuck in the jam, in a rain for...45 minutes?

---------------------------------------
10th March

stayed over at Ying's house for thenight.
had burger ( without ketchup ), wedges ( not really crunchy ) and coke ( the only normal processed food as the only 'task' was to open the bottle ) for dinner.

played cards, learn how to play mah jong ( still blurr ) untill 3.30am.

amy stayed the night through awake.

ps. must have been some kind problem with nana's eye's that night.... she praised me trice in a day o.O

----------------------------------------

11th March

dont ask.

it's bad.

so bad, i think it'll cost me a lot of courage if i'm gonna meet my really kind, good bio and chemistry teacher next time. :(

---------------------------------------

12 March
vivien's birthday!!! she helped me a lot so i wanted it to be a surprise. too bad, she was too observant x( and i was too easy to see observe.

and i was just wondering if there was a even more blurr person than me in this world cause she didn't even ask when she saw me doing ' something' ( poking candles and panic-ing when i realise there is a missing candle on a chair opposite her) in front of her.

anyway, happy birthday!! remember to open all the wishing stars, kay? :)

---------------------------------------

13th March

saw lots of people in the open day. wonder if i'll be seeing any of them soon here? it'll be fun!

-----------------------------------------

18th March

found this really exciting blog. credits to eva.
and changed the blog skin! credits to eva too!

go here >>>> Yasmine

don't be impressed. the link above to allow you readers ( if any ...x.x ) to go to her blog, is also help from eva.

ps. i'll never understand weired codings. computer illiterate aleart!!! x.x

--------------------------------

wish me luck! important-must-pass-or-else-have-to-pay-rm300-per-paper tmr!!!! pray for me... seriously ==

it's my last T1 and T2 exam tmr ( hopefully ) .... let me pass... please? * hopeful look*

past events~

2010-02-17T02:59:00.002+08:00

last Wednesday

i wore secondary school's white t-shirt to college. as it would be weired to pair it with my usual jeans, i had to wear a skirt with it. it was my first time wearing a skirt to college.

why did i do that? lol, cause i promised eva i'll wear the white uniform if she wore it too.

so, with a school uniform, i obviously invited stares. especially ivy.

ivy: .......*stares*

me: er, yes? * while continue walking to the lobby*

ivy: is that....

me: this? *tugs shirt* yup! it's my white school uniform i wore to school!

ivy: omg, really? i thought i looked familiar but i wasn't sure!

me: haha...... *akwardnesss*

back at class..........

michell, angle.....: *mumbles mumbles and stare*

me: * continue walking to find a nice seat*

michell: cL!

me: huh? *turns to face her*

michell: are you wearing the school uniform arh?

me: uh huh, yeah?

michell: oh.. * turns to angel and continue mumbling*

that's how weired it is. so i thought......

then, eva came in.

she was wearing the same white shirt, smaller in size, a sweater and a extremely SHORT mini skirt.o short in fact, that she HAD to wear a pair of tights underneath. ( i tell you, she looked REALLY HOT in that. which in turn makes me look sloppy )

oh yeah, so she won the attention and the wolf whistles that day. x.x but i think she did not want as many attention as she obtain that day xP ( this is PURELY a comment, not due to jealousy or what-so-ever )

that night, went out for dinner with amy, ying, nana, loon, teoh, and wai kit. had 'lou sang' and simple dishes at sri petaling.

as the guys left the table to go 'the store', a fight took place.

this drunk guy ( he couldn't even stand properly ) was speaking some unknown language and took out his fist to hit another guy at a table just next to ours. but before he hit, he half fall on the floor, so his opponent ( the guy that was about to get hit ) had to pull him up instead of defending himself.

at that point of time, they were preety close to us already, but we were too shocked to do anything. then, the drunk guy who got helped got pissed off for being helped. he tried to push his opponent away and slam his hand on our table for support.

instinctively, all 4 of us girls practically left our seats and ran as far off as possible, clinging to one another. it wasn't too far either as all the other tables have left their tables too. i scarcely remember amy saying something to us, but i was in too much shock to take it in.

then, the drunk guy laid his eyes on the same thing i suddenly remembered we left on the table.

amy's bottle of red wine.

before any of us could do anything, the drunk guy grabbed the 3 quarters full bottle of wine a tried to throw it at his opponent.

being drunk, he missed. leaving a big pool of red wine on the tar road.

then, another person came over, tried to calm the guy, and lead him away.

the 4 of us were then left there shocked with a bottle of shattered wine.

.......i think the boss felt guilty about it, but asked for full payment ANYWAY. and the guys? useless bunch of guys disbelief us about the fight and teased us until the staffs told loon that there WAS a fight.

--------------------------------------------------------

last Thursday,

went last minute shopping at mega mendung with mom.

met quek outside maybank, and zhi seng at central.

-------------------------------------------------------------

last friday n Saturday,

left over spring cleaning and dinner and granma's house. won RM 2 during black jack.

-----------------------------------

last sunday,

Ang pao!!!! Ang Pao, Ang pao, Ang Pao, Ang pao, Ang Pao, Ang pao, Ang Pao, Ang pao!!!!!!!

watched new moon with cousins. i won rm3. dad lost, rm45 =.= ...... told his to stop betting...

PS, one of my cousins actually brought chess to play with me but i didn't realize as i was too busy with cards. :( And he did not even whine about it. Nice guy.... :)

------------------------------------------

monday

ang paos, food, cards and chess :)

ps, won rm27 ~^^

--------------------------------------------

today,

bake, fail.

blog,

facebook,

KFC

and now, preparing to sleep.

nitez, people!

----------------------------------------

cL here, signing off

Boriiiiing

2010-02-17T02:15:00.000+08:00

went facebook again just now. after 'happy farming', played 'vampire' then go looking up for any new pics uploaded by friends......

you know what's this called? LIFELESS

it's soooo boring.... please, i NEED a LIFE

i dont wanna stick to the comp every free time i got that i dont feel like sleeping. i want to be busy, to be busy planning events for people i care, to be busy on outings with friends or family members, to be busy chatting up with people instead of staring at a certain something, feel like commenting on it but think that it will not be appropriate since i do not know the person as well as i hope to.

it's chinese new year, for goodness sake, it's like my ONLY break of the semester. weired why i wouldn't want to spent my well-deserved-break sleeping huh? i've no idea.

anyway, curious why i'm emo?

simple, i did baking today. ( THAT probably explains itself already )

..................

FINE, so i baked another bunch of disfigured cookies ( it's not my fault! stupid CENTRAL doesn't have cold enough air-con to keep the mini kisses in pieces! it was all melted and stuck together when i brought it home... ), so what? it's my specialty! i mean, who else can bake more disfigured cookies that i can? *wink*

hmmm, maybe i should set up my own bran ;x .....

how does ''famous cl disfigured cookies' sound? :D it's not really meant for or eating ( unless the person thinks disfigured cookies are a better way to get a a bad tummy and get a MC than flu ) , it's just a motivation for other failed bakers and a moto for people who dont bake to get started. because, 'famous cl disfigured cookie' balieves that ANYBODY can bake :)

oh, i STILL need a life. outing anyone? ;)

outings!!!

2010-02-03T01:35:00.002+08:00

hmmm, lets see.

outing on sunday with, hui ming, hui li, ji xian and kah keong. primary class mates!

it was supposed to be hui ming's birthday on monday, but i asked to have an outing on sunday. so we did! i baked something-that-looks-like-a-chocolate-cake for her!

everything was pretty weired.

we watched haunted university, and went gaming. then, we went to red box.

it was supposed to be a surprise. the cake and everything..... but she was having a fever and was so quiet. the whole thing was pretty weired in the end as me and hui li accompanied her while waiting for her dad.

she is such an innocent, sweet girl. so innocent in fact, that i feel bad.

anyway, next time, i think i'll bring her for movies. ( she didn't even BLINK throughout the movie! )

Outing with Po Chi and Wan Qi

happy birthday Po Chi!

i wanted to bake a similiar cake for po chi, but i thought of how delicate her family's stomach might be and canceled the thought. ==

so instead, i bought a mini mud cake from ZEN!

i really enjoyed it when we just walk around, chatting, nibbling and telling tales. it was fun :)

though i have to also mention it wasn't perfect as i was, in a way, 'black listed' =.= that part, not fun. ( sorry~x.x )

oh, and to do a little promoting, 'timeless penang' searves really great asam laksa. go try it!

Outing with course-mates ;)

classes on friday ends early. at 12.30pm, so.....

OUTING!!! to pyramid!

17 of us took of by different means of transport. 4 cars, and a few who love their legs too much, preferred to walk.

went there, met at Starbucks, buy tickets for 15 students and a COUPLE *ngek ngek ngek* for the show, 'tooth fairy'!

then, we rushed to mcD to pack value meal ( preparing to smuggle in xP ) and rushed upstairs. the movie starts in 15 minutes.

after everyone was there, we went in, being 15 minutes late.

in the darkness, we had difficulties finding our seats....suddenly...

SPOTTED!!! middle row of chairs all empty for 12 to sit.

THAT's US!!! how convenient.

anyway, the show was funny. lol.

went to ZEN after a LONG making decision time. snapped plenty of photo's and went home. ( check out the photo's in my facebook!)

nice day.....

-----------------------------------------------

sleepy CL here, signing off *yawn*

college life 2

2010-02-03T01:03:00.003+08:00

.....sleepy

wanna hear my routine?

i wake up at 5.50am

catch the 6.30am sunway bus at sri petaling LRT station

sleep in bus for an hour

go for 8 or 8.30 classes

go out for lunch with friends

continue classes

try NOT to nod off in class and make sense of whats going on

end classes at 5pm

get on the 5.30pm bus

sleep my hour on the bus

reach LRT station

get somebody to pick me up

(i mean it, it's so tough getting somebody to pick me up! example...

me: *beep beeeep beeeep*

dad: hello? you at LRT already?

me: yup, can you pick me?

dad: i'm busy now, get your brother to pick you up. slam! *ends call*

me: ........

me:*beep beeeep beeep...... beeeeep beeeeeeeeeeeeeep*

bro: what? *annoyed*

me: er, gor arh, can pick me up or not?

bro: WHAT? why every time also i pick you up one? i driver arh? i'm not even paid! *mad*

me:yea yea yeah i know...... *pause* so can you pick me?

bro: *irritated* go and ask mom lah! duuuuuuutttt *ends call*

me: *beeep beeeeep beeeeep* hello? mummy arh?

mom:i busy now la, you wait until 6.35pm first

me: huh? .....orh

mom: duuut *ends call*

....................

ring ring *handphone rings*

me: hello?

mom: i ask gor to pick you up.

me: orh, ok....*beeeeep* *ends call*

see how tough it is? i even have to listen when my brother grumbles about picking me up on the car.... )

reach home at 7.15pm

dinner

homework

sleep

..........

daily routine. tiring? definitely. worth it? i have no idea. but whatever it is, i'm NOT giving up. i spend too much time and effort already. not to mention the bi-weekly internal exams that you almost MUST pass.....

Dude, i'm gonna GET my ACCA. >:) plus, the people here are fun :D and doesn't find my hyper-activeness weired xP ( or maybe they do?)

oh, and i get to go interview mr.TEOH, founder of Sunway-TES, this thursday. wish me luck!

PS, i get to create stuff here! i officially made tomorrow ' miss-your-secondary-school-life-day' so, everybody got to wear club or school or class t-shirts! isn't it cool? :D

College

2010-01-12T14:29:00.002+08:00

...wow

i went to sunway yesterday, expecting to register for CAT classes on 18th Jan which was said by lecturers of sunway at a education fair to be a better option as the other January intake CAT classes had started.

today, i'm blogging using the computers provided in sunway.

What the..?

it was all so sudden. when i went to register, they( business-minded people in charge of registration who gave me the papers given out during orientation cause the orientation is over left me all blurrr [ cant talk bad about sunway xP since i'm happily using the facilities now AND it's against the rule o.o ] ) told me they cant open a new class cause the 4 current classes are not full.

meaning....

i bump into a class-full of students as a late-comer-alien-who was-not-at-the-orientation.

NOT my style. or maybe it is? ;)

anyway, when i reached the class, i hesitated. am i in the right class? only way, *knock* *knock* '' erm...excuse me? is this the class for group 3? *smiles a hopefully friendly looking smile*"

"erm, yeah."

"thanks"

....thank godness the students are all pretty friendly and not selfish idiots. :D not that i managed to have a chance to talk to ALL the people :( oh well, it's a start^^ at least i think they all look pretty friendly.

oopss, sunway are out of the text books i need. Cant be helped, since i'm a LATE comer. oh oh, and something else very unlucky happened to me, but it's nothing major....if i keep my cool ;) (hope nobody notice this though)

scheduals( is that how you spell it) are PACKED >.< (gaaaahhh, less shopping and haging out time.... NOOoooo)

so....sorry people, if i promised to go out with you and cant make time. ( i even had to cancel my undang test to attend classes :'( there goes my RM40 )

another thing...
anybody going sunway who stays in OUG? i'm in transportation problem. some of the classes ends at 6.15pm and i'm left stranded here. ( well, not yet. but i will if i dont find a solution by 20th x.x ) erm, i'll pay for the tol fees and car park? :D ( oh, the car parks here, have surcurity cameras and autopay machine...how cool is that? for a college. or am i out-dated? oh well...)

reminder to self...
1. bring a huge sweater next time ( it's freezing i tell you, my fingers are literally frozen! )
2. bring a calculator ( what student in finance course will NOT think of bringing a calculator to classes? don't guess, it's me x.x )
3. Hurry up and deal with all the student cards! (it's such a bother being independant. but the feeeling and sense of accomplishment rocks)
4. speaking of independent, gotta go get notes for lecturers on missed classes! ( if i want to pass the mini exam on friday x.x )

that's it!
the begining of a fantastic start! watch me grow, and be fascinated! ( or you can be jealous if you want, lol, not that i recommend it though)

cL here, signing off ;) *wink*

2010-01-08T01:35:00.002+08:00

i was watching a scandle video of a couple kissing in school on facebook just now. as i was watching it, i thought of how embarassing the couple in the video would be in the future. in my opinion, when such videos are ever released to public, it can NEVER be retrived. domebody, somewhere would definately have watched this particular video.

Example: remember the video, negarakuku? which caused quite a commotion for sometime and made it to the headlines? it was removed immediately when the goverment demanded it to be. out of curiosity, i typed ' negarakuku' on youtube few months after the scandle. sure enough, there were videos of it the clip. only difference is that it wasn't as clear.

isn't it a wonder how much harm the internet, something almost everybody uses daily can cause?

~is it human nature for us to love scandle? yet, nobody ever wants to be involved being the characters IN the scandle. we just like to watch and comment....i guess that's what you call guilty pleasure.

yeah right, blame your guilty pleasure on human nature -.- bah, who cares, bet everyone knows and noticed this fact already.

KBSW

2010-01-07T00:10:00.003+08:00

quick, 30 minutes more before my mom's laptop goes out of battery. >.<

new fascination. KBSW, Astro 303. wen li has been bugging me to check it out ages ago. never bothered x) not much of a korean fan.( sorry girls! :( and boys for this matter. i still cant tell the member apart from each other. [ all the skinny pretty girls in SNSD kinda look the same to me] ) but mind you, i do like certain korean song and there was quite a number of video clips on youtube on korean game shows that made me rewatch several time.

go youtube and type:
super juniour genie star dance battle

and laugh you heads off. ;D you can check out other pretty cool video's from there. ( yes, i'm too lazy to type them all out so, go do your own reserch on funny videos! ^^ time flies )

you know what's the other easy way out?

find somebody who loves korean entertainment, be it kpop or game shows and visit thier blog! ( that's what i always do x) *evil laughter* easy way out for LAZY people) example.... click the name ELAINE at the links of my blog to visit an active blogger who happens to be a kpop fan! ( i'm doing advertising for you elaine ^^ i know i'm welcomed :) )

she'll be one happy girl to have other people discussing her favorite kpop band with her. ( obviously SNSD, you'll be blind if you visited her blog and NOT know it )

anyway, KBSW has quite a numder of really entertaining drama's and game show. check it out if you're bored and your favorite shows aren't on air.

~enjoy your remaining holidays when you can :]

=.=

2010-01-06T00:41:00.002+08:00

today is tuesday...votings are officially closed with a fair amount of votes each! zero, in this case....-.- apparently, this blog is almost dead. so, ask me in person if you're interested in future. i'm too depressed over the results to blog now. lol.

PS. college starts soon. wish me luck! ;D

PPS. who's working where? i'd love to see my schoolmates working!

PPPS. any gossips people? i'm interested. nah, just joking

randomness~

2010-01-03T03:10:00.004+08:00

it's been ages since i last blogged, so lets see....

1. the 6d4n camp i took part in which happens to collide with my 17th birthday

2. the surprise party by my primary school classmates

3. the search for the suitable pre-U course and college to go for

4. the outing with my brother/ Amy and Ying

5. karaoke session after spm, lol

6. pretty emo outing on new year's eve

7. after spm ( which pretty sums up 1 to 6 )

take a pick!

vote (in the chatbox) for the one you are most interested in ( dontpicksavendontpicksevendontpickseven) and i'll post it! (if anybody still bothers to visit a abandoned going to be shattered and probably haunted blog x.x )

voting period closes on TUESDAY. xP

New Year's Eve

2010-01-03T02:51:00.002+08:00

31st of December 2009 was my worst new year's eve ever. i spent my last few minutes of 2009 walking on the side of a road. when the fireworks went off, i could only stare and exclaim. it was beautiful. that was probably my greatest moment of the night.

........

gosh, now i'm damn emo. and i have to get up at 6.30 for undang classes tmr!!!! >.<

p.s i still feel extremly sorry to the innocent-did-not-even-see-his-face-stranger guy i kicked on accident when i was flaring up that morning. he must have been cursing me for a bad start to a new year, lol.

SPM bluess~~

2009-11-17T10:08:00.001+08:00

it's officially 23 hours to spm but i'm still stuck with the past on every detail of my last day i school on the 13th of November 2009......

good luck everyone!

retirement

2009-09-20T17:31:00.002+08:00

lol, i sound like a 55 year-old old lady. anyway, yesterday was my retirement as ajk PRS. it was rather emotional, at least for me, near the end of the event. but i managed to blink it away. i had plenty i wanted to tell during my speech, but i was lost for words. kinda regret it. i had so many people i wanted to thank, so many things i want to tell, but it never came out. i wonder if anybody will ever know how much i wanted to tell?

yesterday, was a slight disappointment. i expected only a small amount of members to turn up, but i was shocked to see only a few. even the group of form 3 boys who has always been rather active left halfway through the event....i guess the form 4's shared our disappointment. what happened to our club? where are the active members we used to have? have they left the club? is it the fact that activities aren't as fun anymore? or is it just how people don't like getting involved in what-seems-boring-but-not-necessary-is anymore?

anyway, i guess i just can't share cheng li's joy of ''i'm finally FREE!!!!'' it didn't felt like the end, it felt like the beginning of many more disappointments and good-byes.

i really truly hope the next batch of you do well. especially you, lim wai pheng, my successor... (did i spell your name right? x.x)

=================================================

oh, on Friday i went out with becca, hui li, and wan qi. my mom actually said no, but later said yes. so i met up with them after the movie.

shucks, missed the movie, i actually thought we were going for 3 movies? bah...

wooohooooo~~~

2009-09-20T17:01:00.002+08:00

i rock, i seriously rock, i seriously ultimately rock

i fixed my blog!!!! xD (it's a big deal ok?) and i have no idea how i did it. x.x i was getting all frustrated for not being able to fix it for the past 1 hour, i couldn't remember what i clicked. suddenly, the layout came back!

my chat box is back, my links are back.....;D

oh, and as they were all recovering, i noticed something.....screw....i only posted 5 post the whole of this year???

wow....that's something i have to work on...together with my studies T.T

trials are OVER!!!!

2009-09-17T03:03:00.001+08:00

pop the champagne! dig out those packs of unwatched DVD's! keep the books!! trial's over!!!!! xD since the kementrian just announced school holiday on Friday, that means, for students who doesn't take accounts or arts( memememememe) its a 11 days straight holiday! :D

have lots of planning the these 11 days, but since i'm such a good girl, i'm going to school tomorrow. to accompany WanQi, AND make plannings ;D

i wanna watch G-Force! (the hamsters are hard-to-resist' ing ly cute!!!)

and UP (balloons!!!)

and ORPHAN~~~ haha, this will probably the first and last time u hear me excited about watching horror movie x.x

-------------------------------------

oh, i'm retiring this Saturday......19th of September.... :'(

from saturday onwards, i will no longer be able to wear my gold tag....will DEFINITELY miss the proud, confident feeling i have when i wear it.

i always wonder if any other ajk's feel what i feel as an ajk. to value your post, to try your best, to try to do all you can? sometimes, when things get rough, complains start piling. then a slight feeling of guilt kind of crawls through, i sometimes think i don't do enough to be worth my post (especially when i'm talking to Cheng Li x( ). and then, there are times, when i feel so over-worked that i feel like i should just give this whole thing up and later becomes all teary that i should think like that. it's a love hate relationship x) but i love it 90 percent more that i hate it.

the best part? to be able to have so many people respect you in some weird way and to know that you are able to MAKE significant changes. so it rather upsets me when i KNOW that there is nothing i can do about somethings. among them, the news about a few members quitting. it was terrible, i was depressed about it for quite some time, tried talking to them, but to no avail.

the worst part? when people thinks, say or hint that this post i am holding has nothing to do. to those who did less things than me, i somehow wonder if you even have the right to say such things. to those who did more than me, well, then it must have been my fault that i couldn't help you enough, so....sincere apologies here. ( i would have preferred to say it 1 on 1, but it'll be weird if a 'sorry' pops out of nowhere. )

so, if i don't get a speech on Saturday, ( hint hint xP ) i want to say that i was generally happy and grateful about this post, even if nobody bothers whether i am or not. i especially treasure our moments in Pangkor :) ( was not because i nearly drowned, ok?) , and the interactions during meetings, kursus tahunan, pameran and others. pameran especially, since it was so stressful. ( was busy the whole time i didn't even had time to explore other clubs! =[ ) was, and still is so glad we got champion :)

this year passed a bit too fast....

to our successors, keep the tradition alive, do the booking early, get all the reports and minutes done on time, do planning, stay as a team and WIN the pameran next year, make it a 5 YEARS STRAIGHT WIN!!

if there's anything i can help, sent me a mail, a text, a ring x) i'll do all i can.

once a prs, always a prs. PRS ROCKS!!!!

----------------------------------------------------------

Hui Li called me up last Sunday afternoon, she told me one of the teachers called to ask her to ask me if i wanted to become a counselor, for a year-end, 5 days 4 night Dharma camp. i was so excited, i said yes before she told me the details. i was rather shocked rather, that the teacher ( whom thought me when i was still in primary school and went for Sunday classes ) actually asked me, who is as good as an outsider. ( although my part of the job is probably going to be a very easy one ) i went for the youth camps conducted by this temple for a few time, it was fun. after that, if i went to the temple again, i always felt guilty, embarrass, and blame my poor memory every time somebody says 'hi' to me and i either do not recognize them or do not remember their name. x.x

anyway, i said yes, and was determined to be able to recognize these people if i ever saw them again. ( you can't imagine the embarrassment when somebody tells you your team member who happens to be in the same school tries to greet you for a whole year and apparently, you have never noticed this...) then when she told me, the camp is from 18th to 22nd of December.....what?! and then my part of the line went silent for some time, full with flash backs of past experience of spending that special day at camps and the shattering sound of all my plans. suddenly, joining the camp as a counselor does not sound very tempting. but, part of me wanted it very bad, so i said i'll just have to change my plans.

too bad Amy, u missed the chance to help celebrate my birthday on the actual day....again

wonder if you guys will have planned it better this year, or even remembered?

------------------------------------------------------------

anyway, trials were terrible, they make you stay up late. i even had a 27 hour no sleep at all experience! too bad i still think i did terrible, maybe cause i did?

wish me luck when i get my papers.

PS, i think Becca should have got higher marks then me in the english essay, i think mine was boringly long winded.

PPS, still find it fascinating how the tips actually bocor'ed?

PPPS, hamsters are seriously cute

oopppsss....

2009-08-19T11:54:00.003+08:00

random title, lol

so here i am, blogging on a Wednesday morning 1 day before exam when everybody else is at school or studying their heads off.....wow, typical example of a naughty girl xD

it's been 3 months since i last blogged, kinda missed it, unexpectedly. still have trouble fixing my blog, my links are all gone, so is my chat box....why? well, guess that's what happen when a smart-allec computer illiterate tries to use some really cute backgrounds from blog-skin. it ended in a total mess, i was so worried i lost my whole blog....phew...

back to the main point....what's with my life?(i guess that's why people read blog? to know about other's life?)

well, have been kinda emo lately, no idea why. just suddenly feel emo for no good reason. i guess it happens, when a friend is upset, or you get frustrated, or maybe found out you were cheated? i just cant be who i WAS anymore, the girl who would just cry in the bathroom with the shower on so nobody heard her. ocasionally, i still do that, but now, i found that sleeping is a GREAT way to get rid off emo-ness!! ( unless you were awaken by people screaming at you to do stuff, then the sleeping idea kinda back-fires) i wonder if it's a healthier change? to release it, or to forget it?

went to school on saturday, for fun. for a change, i found it nice. an empty bus, with the wind blowing straight in ur face, a quiet school with just enough students. an half empty class, to chat about. and a whole lot of place to play volley ball. there was no pressure.....school without pressure is great, with buddies and games and no homework.

oh oh, and i started writting again!! hope i don't get anymore battle scenes, my last battle scene took me a year =.= and we got a new character!!! will post when the whole story is done. btw, the story's in Chinese.

also, i took the personality and career test. haha, they were so accurate!!( i'm orange btw, which is the kind of person who love challenges, thinks life is a game, messy, and can't bear to be stuck in 1 place, sociable. wanqi is gold. neat, quiet, decent, follow rule...in other words, good girl type. TYPICAL!!!) i basically have a job option in mind, but am now in doubt again. kinda quarreled with my mom for 3 days over this.

ending this post, mom's gonna come home, she'll scream to see me online xD any comments, tell me in school, my chatbox is gonna take some time to recover >.>

------------------------------------------------------------------

to random person,

if you feel emo now, go to sleep! it helps.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

to other computer illeterates like me,

if you want to experiment on something with the computer that involves something as important as ur blog.....2 options.

1. don't do it
2. get someone to help you, or
3. prepare to get unexpected results xD

just a pointer, no offence~

----------------------------------------------------------------------

to me,

STUDYYYY!!!!!! chinese tmr!!!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

and again, thanks for reading my blog, =D it'll be quite a while till my next post. T.T

so long, ciao~~

emo day

2009-05-01T02:44:00.002+08:00

i'm back!!!! to save my blog from being further criticized by some human who complain that it's dead. it's not dead, NOT, so stop it, you're hurting IT =.=

anyway, since i'm blogging EARLY in the MORNING cause i was sleeping for....what? 5 hours in the afternoon? oh, and brother wants to claim credit for staying up awake with me. i was thinking, maybe i should update some stuff, like what happened during kursus asas PRS, PRS race( more or less like a less expensive version of 'the amazing race'), current life and the STRESS!!! gosh, with all those intervensi papers and diagnostic......what, are exams made to make student's suffer? cause they did a GREAT job.

firstly, about my curent life. what can i say? it's sort of unbelievable....not really in a good way....somehow, everything just suddenly piles up....i just can't believe how selfish people can be, expecially if it's a close friend whom you know ou'll never let go and continue believing in no matter how many times they unintentionally hurt you.

you know what, i just don't get it, i thought since young we were thought to treat people the way we want to be treated...so why am i scolded for no reason just by being caring? just by being what i think a good friend will do, i got scolded. and when i voice it out, what do people say? they say i shouldn't be caring and basically just shut my mouth. what else did i miss, oh yeah, i was also told that i should come to school every morning and give everybody a moody face. why? apparently, my happy, cherry, positive smile i hang on my face in the morning drives sleepy, not-fully-awake people mad.

so how would you feel my dear readers? when everything you try to do right i being turned up-side down? every morning when you come to school, full of hope, eager to meet your friends, you are greeted by moody faces who turn thier backs at you or scowl at you?

...........................

...................................

............................................

...................................................

ugghh, enough of all the emo stuff, sounds so not like me, which is why i found a great solution to cure emo-ness....sleep!!! ( works only for forgetful people and people who don't remember people's faults easily ) 5 hours later, you will probably forgotten why are you spending so much time on these kind of stuff and immediately forgive them....partly...and continue with your life.

now, for the more happy part!!!
PRS race!!! which was held last last saturday. li pheng and i were station masters at the mamak stall near the school. oh, and we had...worms.....big, fat, juicy, disgusting worms...*ngek ngek* too bad the pics are not with me, but when i learn how to get my chatbox, and how to load pictures here, i'll load them. =D

haha, the poor juniors sure had a tough time serching through the drains for pieces of paper while singing song, which puts 'twinkle twinkle little star' on the TOP of the list as the most popular song to be sang by all group members. *clap clap clap*

next up, kursus asas PRS. it's usually held later but we pushed it forward this year and had it last saturday. the attendance was a bit of a dissapointment but it was fun!! ( hey, when i check the paper later, i'm gonna strangle anybody who dares leave even 1 section of te pyramid blank, you understand? ) lol, kar men, thum and me were showing off our 'sunkist' tarik skills to pour all the left overs into bottles.

the exams were wacky, gosh, did they really study? but hey, no worries, if you're so worried about your test results, make sure your attendence is great and stay active, you'll be save ^^ the counselling part turned out to be more of a joke than anything else. what can i say, my acting sucks =P i heard kai li pretended to be a pregnant lady who was VERY emotional, lol, suits her so much!!!! right, jennice?

and that kinda concludes my current status, still me and am ready to face the world =D ...( by world, it doesn't include secnod term exams )

till then, liNg

recent events

2009-04-07T21:42:00.002+08:00

really really busy these days, have tons of post in draft waiting to be completed

anyway, here are the more memorable events that happened recently.

1. 13th march
exams over!!! haha, can finally watch Animes without limit!!! yeah!!! wait up bleach movies 1 n 2 ( which rocks btw, but i personally prefer the second), ouran high school host club, god save, library wars and probably alice accademy andvampire knight too......gah!!!! anime SERIOUSLY rocks!!!!!

oh yeah, btw, to those who went to kuantan, have FUN!!!!

2. 19th march
Pre-april fool. i actually invited wan qi to go pasar malam together today but she rejected. so i went with my brother. bought tau fu fa and milk tea. went home and watch tv. and guess who called? an unknown number. i picked up and to my surprise it was a classmate in school. then he asked me who i was. i was dumbstruct and immediately asked him if he was being fooled around. i mean, who will call somebody they don't know unless it's a prank, right? then even before knowing who i am, he continued asking if i wanted to go sunway the next day. it was then that i heard sze wei and alot of other people laughing and EVERYTHING fit in. pity him and screw you guys!!! why am I the victim?? not that i was fooled but why me??? which was why i did not answer ANY of his questions untill he abruptly hung up. ( i totally forgot about this till i read elaine's blog. which is totally UNTRUE!!! ) and i went to sleep. the end.

3. 20th-21th march
i am a pure KL girl. 100 percent to the core. but i seriously don't know KL, the buildings and everything? dont ask me, i've only been the time square 3 times!! and the first 2 times i went there? i didn't even know it was time square =.=

anyway, i told my dad, ''hey, dy (short for daddy), when can you bring me to tour KL? i want to go bukit bintang and see the night view." and god knows, 2 weeks later during dinner, he announced that we will be staying in Sharaton hotel for a 2days 1 night stay during the march holidays.

am i happy? of course i am, but it's such a weired thing to do.( btw, this is NOT the first time our family is doing this kind of thing) you want any souveniers? Get them yourself!! it's KL!! LOL.

so i went shoping with my mom( the boys prefered staying in the hotel room watching tv), which was kinda fun, too bad she was too tired from her work. i bought a jacket which i liked, with my OWN pocket money my dad gave in advance T.T which means i'll be broke next month!!!

the room was nice, the bed was huge and they had feather pillows!!! 8 pillows all together!!! and i love the bathroom, spacious. but what really took the cake was the window. there was a place to sit there for you to enjoy the night view!!! just my type. ( though it's mainly night clubs)

and we had dinner in the really expensive chinese hotel restorant, in which i excidentally ordered a ten dollars per head premium chinese tea. and i dont even know the difference between premium tea and normal cheap tea( which is also expensive....five dollars per head)!! the worst thing is that except for the really quiet and high-class looking envioroment, it's no big deal. ( no offence to the chefs btw. erm, the pecking duck was nice?)

4. 25th march
one of my sista's birthday, ally!! happy sweet 17!! sorry i cant celebrate for you after school though. lol, i didn't manage to see her expression too when she opened her locker to see the chocolate, birthday cards and rose petals filled locker. must have been priceless.

5. 28th march
merentas desa day and earth day. i went you know, such a good girl. though i was cursing most of my classmates and amy for dumping my way back. my stamina's bad, i know!! don't bully me!!! but wanqi was really nice and waited for me though i asked her to run off first without me =( on the other hand, amy kept dashoing off every time i was close! i met po chi on the way who sat resting cause she felt dizzy and walked the last part back with her. lol, first time reach so late untill there was no more water from pandu girls. went to KFC after that with po chi, jingqi and lee xian for breakfast and a long girl chat.

after dinner, went pasar malam, and switched off all the lights!! almost the whole pf my whole neighbourhood switched off thier lights!!! it felt so warm to know that people cared for this world. my conclusion? educated and civalised people are people who care and switch off thier lights, unless they have no idea about this whole thing of course, which is almost impossible.

my younger brother had a fun time playing with the torch light and my mom took the no computer time an opportunity to talk to us about our future. so like her. i saw some families took chairs out for family talk too in the dark....that night, even the street lights were brighter than usual...hopefully filling our earth with more hope for the future.

6. April fool!!!
crazy event, 2 boys in my class was betting each other to eat crickets!!! what the heck is wrong with them? crazy or what? one of them even said it was 'biscuits' he was eating, not crickets =.= but it really got the class heated up since it was a relief period. though some of the girls were making it too much of a fuss......okay, maybe i DID make SOME fuss but at least i wasn't TOO noisy.....other than that, nothing much happened

7. 2nd April
kai yan's birthday today!!! wanqi brought a birthday card and i helped passed it around. happy birthday!! may all your dreams come true!!!

8. 3rd April
school was so boring today. no classes and the class was empty. everbody was busy with raptai hari sukan......oh well, i'm sure it's fun for those of you who took part so, gambateh and do your best!!!!

9. 4th April
actual sports day today but i didn't go. must have been cursed by becca cause not going to midvalley with her to watch the confessions of a shoppaholic after that.

that about it. till then....

another failure

2009-01-02T18:37:00.000+08:00

you know, seeing others fail are always easier than failing something yourself. you might think you know how the person feels if you see the person go through the hard work and then through the failure, you might even say '' aw, that's sad he/she worked so hard at it and failed...i can imagine how that feels....'' you know what, you cant. so instead of putting on a sad face or criticizing on the failed product, why don't you just try giving ideas on how to improve the failed products at the right time, not when the person is at their lowest point. IF you cant do that, then just keep your mouth shut about it, nobody asked you about YOUR opinion.

yeahifailedbakingagain....sowhat

finally

2008-11-27T00:50:00.000+08:00

updating.....was trying to complete the tags i OWE people....but, was still not done after 3 hours...TT so it's now rotting in the draft till i find the mood to complete it, sorry guys =P

anyway, hols are here.....and they are half way gone!!!! gosh, how fast does time slip by when you least expects it. and i haven't even managed to watch the animes i wanted TT thanks to my brother who is rushing assignments after assignments....talk about college life, i thought they were suppose to be fun?

so, how have i been lately? well lets see, last Saturday i went to a salon in pj state which i have always had high comment on.....until saturday, that is. i waited for, what, 20 minutes? before someone came and asked me how i would like my hair cut, well, i don't mind waiting since it's rather full. then she started snipping......snip....snip....snip went the scisors....... before i knew it, AAaaaaaHHhhhh!!!!!!!! i had a more terrible hair cut than when i was in standard 6 !!!!!!!! i was too stunned to say anything or to even stop her from snipping anymore, i sat there on the chair, stared at the miror in horor, and..............

.......nodded my head........yes, you read right, i nodded my head.....i guess my brain was somehow affected, or else, i would have glared at her insted of smilling like an idiot at the miror!! later, after she was done TOYING with my hair, i stood up and walk towards the entrance. " don't worry 'bout it, in one or two weeks time, i'll grow nicely.".................one...or two weeks? so what am i gonna do? walk around the street in a mask? it's not even halloween!! PLUS, our contry dont celebrate halloween!!

............................

how much worse can a girl get than a freaky hairstyle, bad throat and a fever plus cough and running nose?

anyway, since i'll be at home for *sound of calculator pressed on* 96 lovely hours, my slow-growing hair had better grow. oh yeah, monday was wenli's birthday, 24th of november. this is actually the first year i remembered!!!!^^ well, not that i'm suppose to be pround of it....taking the fact that i known her since preschool and that her father is my dad's friend and also that i went to camerons with her TWICE already.........

.......you know, i have a REALLY bad memory...

so anyway, i remembered!!! and i sent her a sms from Malaysia at 12 am....to MELBOURME, australia!!! fantastic how the phone lines get us together in which she replied me...at 6am == then it got me thinking, you know, maybe i should get her a present or something, since i haven't given her anything before xP but then again, why spoil her? i sent her a birthday wish sms and i'm freezing her a cake and i remembered the actual day of her birthday!! good enough for me, i guess? and yes, i'm an ungrateful, forgetful, annoying, irritating, cheeky brat.....but i guess that's my speciality, i pick a quiet victim and bug the victim till the person talks......po chi's a great example, lol.

but wen li's story is really different you know, you wont believe it even if i told you. we first met in a school bus, when we were still in kindergarden.

this was the tale of how we met:

'' after the bell rang that day, all the kiddies ran out to board the bus or go home with thier parents. the bus was quickly filled, so the little girl who came in the bus late had no place to sit. she stared around for a seat. suddenly she spots a seat and sits down next to another girl. none said anything. after a while, the girl suddenly turns to the other and say...'' can i be your friend?''.....stunned, the other replied '' sure...''

and that's how it all started. sorry if my memory was a bit blurr or i added some stuff but i was so shocked that anybody actually turned and ask, '' can i be your friend?'' i remembered it quite well. from then on, i took notice of another homosapien except for the few that were close to me.

not that we were close after that but, we were okay. i only started to really know her when we were in standard 5. we played stones together. cant remember though why she joined me in my ''polishing ugly stone quest using a toothbrush'' hahahaha, sweet memories.....i think it was because i was bugging her and irritating her to play with me while waiting for my mom, oh sheesh, doesn't matter now, we're on good terms.

guess that's it for today.

p/s, spent over a hundred on baking ingredients that day, hope everything turns out ok....at least edible...x.x....screw the milk products that shot sky high, the scs butter was rm8.40!!! and the bar of 2kg philadaphia cream cheese, rm44!!!

i'm back!!!.....i guess

2008-11-21T22:23:00.000+08:00

tags......i'm loaded with them....anybody kind enough to help me type my answers to the questions? i'll....erm.....bake u a cake? ( no guarantee that it'll be nice )......*waiting for reply*....................*waiting some more for reply*....................*waiting really really impatiently for reply*...............okay, fine, i'll do it, thanks to all of u who TAGGED me, how SWEET of u to do that, i'm sure u guys tagged me cause u all LIKE me TOO much right?

feel all your hair rising? dont worry bout it, i just need some motivation to get started. so here's the tag.

--------------------

from becca

Rules:
1. The rules of the game get posted at the beginning.
2. Each player answers the questions about themselves.
3. At the end of the post the player then tags 5 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves a comment, letting them know they got tagged and to ask them to play and read your blog.

Starting time: 2309
Name: cai ling (?)
Sisters: none
Brothers: GY(elder) and GJ(younger)

Shoe size: no telling, guess, 4-7 [ i have big feet x( ]
Height: 160.5 ( i guess, if i hadn't grown taller or shorten )

where do you live: in a ordinary row of terrace house in the middle of a lot of other terrace houses?

Favourite drinks: erm.....ice lemon tea, pearl milk tea....basically all creamy drinks and ice blends
Favourite breakfast: PANCAKES!!!!! and FRENCH TOAST with honey and peanut butter!!!! ^^

have you everbeen on a plane?: yeah
( changing this question) swam/float in the ocean:( second option) yeah huh, a crab even manage to get in between me and my life jacket when i was snorkeling in perhentian =.=
Fallen asleep at school: who doesn't?
Broken someone's heart: i guess so?
Fell off your chair: yeah? i've done MANY humiliating stuff, so.....you won't want to know
Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call: yuh huh ( no telling who is it )
Saved e-mails: yup, and memorable sms'ses too.......especially the one becca sent me =P

What is your room like: bare? with a bed, a TV, a cupboard, a bookshelf, a antique computer....
What's right beside you: a cup of root beer?

the last thing you ate: pizza~~~~^^
Ever had chicken pox: yeah
Sore throat: always, never liked them
Stitches: nope~
Broken nose: nope and i hope i never will

Do you believe in love at first sight: guess so, anything can happen
Like picnics: yeah, especially if my mom makes those triangular toasted sardine sandwiches

Who was/were the last person/people you danced with: with the cloth to wash dishes? yeah, i'm a wierdo, just felt hyper active that day
Last made you smile: my elder brother
You last yelled at: eh.....nobody i can remember, i've been feeling either extreamly good or extrealy sick these days....none which conditions fit to make me scream

Today did you:
Talk to someone you like: duh? i talk everyday to people i like
Kiss anyone: nope
Get sick: yeaahh, now.....and i'm doing a tag instead of sleeping, how great is that?
Talk to an ex: .....ex?
Miss someone: uh huh, but not VERY much
Eat: yeaaah.

Best feeling in the world: when i'm feeling mischievous while talking to someone i like, when someone praises me, when enjoying the cities' night view or some really nice things or when i eat food i like
Do you sleep with stuffed animals: of course, i used to not be able to sleep without my teddy or rabbit.
What's under your bed: dust bunnies?
Who do you really hate: nobody currently

What time is it now? : 2339

Random:
Is there a person who is on your mind now: nope
Do you have any siblings: 2 brothers.
Do you want children: uh.. no idea?
Do you smile often: yeah, i practically smile for no reason...if i'm in the mood
Do you like your hand-writing: sometimes, most of the time, no, it's really ugly

Are your toe nails painted: nope.
Whose bed other than yours would you rather sleep in: my younger brother's bed ( used to be mine ) , hotel's bed!!!! cause u can mess it up and nobody's gonna scold u, and they are usually cold with those big heavy warm cuddly blankets.
What color shirt are you wearing now: white shirt with a shark pic from gold coast
What were you doing at 7:00 p.m. yesterday: .........gee, i can't remember.....this is bad

I can't wait till: my fever's over
Are you a friendly person: depends
Do you have any pets: nope

Where is the person you have feelings for right now?: no idea
Did the last person you held hands with mean anything to you now?: i can't remember who was last.

Do you sleep with the TV on?: yeah, when i watch lat night movies
What are you doing right now?: typing
Have you ever crawled through a window?: nope, i'm a good girl
Can you handle the truth?: if it's some cold hard truth, no.....but still, it's better to tell me plainly than having me find out myself
Are you too forgiving?: i dunno.
Are you closer to your mother or father?: equally

Who was the last person you cried in front of?: po chi? it was a long time....
How many people can you say you've really loved?: my families plus close friends, i'd say, urhm, 13?

Do you eat healthy?: nope.
Do you still have pictures of you & your ex?: No ex...
Have you ever cried because of something someone said to you?: yeah
If you're having a bad day, who are you most likely to go to?: my teddy, my bro, or my very close friends whom i feel most comfortable with at that time
Are you loud or quiet most of the time?: loud....bad habit
Are you confident?: sometime, if there's something i must do and that i'm well prepared

5 things I was doing 10 years ago:
1. sticking a chewing gum in a guy in my kinder garden's hair and got beating for it
2. watching Disney movies and sucking on gummy bear sweets
3. bugging my brother to draw me a pic of sailor moon
4. playing barbie dolls and tea parties?
5. going for walks with my dad to a fenced up river near my old house to see fireflies....tons of them.....though it's a sad fact that the river is now polluted and the fireflies died off and also that people have to PAY to see fireflies nowadays....

5 things on my to-do list today:
1. make sure i pass my add math for the next term exam
2. bug my bro to give me the computer password
3. freeze two cakes for two November babies
4. pass up tuition homework and other school projects on time
5. spend more time chatting and catching up with family and friends

5 snacks I enjoy:
1. fruits
2. yogurt
3. sushi
4. popcorn
5. potato chips

5 things I would do if I were a billionaire:
1. treat my whole family and close friends to a relaxing trip?
2. buy a small island and built a castle on top of the mountains......ahhhHHHH!!!!
3. travel all around the universe
4. make more money and later write a book on how to make more money which will in time make more money for me? lol
5. do charity

5 of my bad habits:
1. eating! O.O non-stop
2. lazy.
3. emotional?
4. forgetful
5. delaying stuff

5 places I have lived in:
1. happy garden
2. serdang
3. oug
4. -
5. -

5 jobs I've had:
1. babysitter.....but the money i get is my pocket money
2. complete household chores, like, 20 cents for moping flour?
3. tuition teacher, for my younger bro, my highest pay ever, rm5
4. doing 4-5 hosehold chores in a day, a meal at subway!!
5. waitress? in my cousin's restaurant

5 people I tag:
nobody......i'm done!!! for 1 tag....TT

-------------------

from here on, is going to be a fantastic 99 questions tag......

tagged by becca also

okay. I'll officially start my tag. here goes to nothing.

1.ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT?
i have a scar filled leg, which one do u want? the one scattered all over? caused by countless mosqitoes in my house which my brother happily peel off after it dried out....CAUSING the scars. and the one on both my knee's? from my fall off the bike....seperately, one of them even had a pebble in it when it was healing making it a even bigger scar

2. WHAT IS ON THE WALLS IN YOUR ROOM?
uhhh....long ago exam time table? no wait, *runs upstairs, riiiiiippppp* there's nothing on my room walls

3. WHAT DOES YOUR CELL PHONE LOOK LIKE?

rectangular?

4. WHAT MUSIC DO YOU LISTEN TO?
i dont choose songs, depends on what song my brother downloads

5. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN?
sometime in the morning?

6. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW?
to sleep? it's 1230 am for goodness sake

8. WHAT'S YOUR MIDDLE NAME?
oh great, 1 less question. middle name? cai ling

9. THE BEST TV SHOW EVER CREATED:
too many, gossip girls, one tree hill, gilmore girls, ugly betty, desperate housewives......

10. THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO?
my mom? she asked me to go to sleep....an hour ago?

11. DO YOU GET SCARED IN THE DARK?
if my brain's fooling me around or after i watch ghost whisperer or even see or read something creepy

12. THE LAST PERSON TO MAKE YOU CRY?
.....long ago, no idea

######13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE COLOGNE / PERFUME?
um.. . I like the lavender smell? not that i use either

14. WHAT KIND OF HAIR/EYE COLOR DO YOU LIKE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX?
blond hair and blue eye's are really cool

15. WOULD YOU RATHER BE SMART OR FUNNY?
smart

16. COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINKS?
depends on what type of coffee

17. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPING?
topping with EXTRA cheese, pineapple, mayonise, lime and ham....>.<

18. IF YOU CAN EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
nothing, maybe strawberries. i had too much pizza just now

19. WHO IS THE LAST PERSON YOU MADE MAD?
my younger brother? cause he wants to watch TV and i want to watch Bleach?

20. DO YOU SPEAK ANOTHER LANGUAGE?
broken, to be laughed at Cantonese, a bit of Hakka and malay, A LOT of English and Chinese.

21. WHAT WAS THE FIRST GIFT SOMEONE EVER GAVE YOU?
i don't know, i just remember getting alot of stuff on my first birthday. a rabbit soft toy from my aunt, a hello kitty soft toy from my grandpa and grandma and a lot of others which i had at the same time but don't remember who gave them to me

22. DO YOU LIKE SOMEONE?
duh, i like everyone.....sometimes?

23. ARE YOU DOUBLE-JOINTED?
nope.

24. FAVOURITE CLOTHING BRAND?
Padini? i don't know, as long as the design suits me?

25. WHAT'S YOUR DREAM CAR?
I don't dream to even drive.

26. WHAT COLOUR IS IT?
black, i guess?

27. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE KIND OF EXERCISE?
i don't LIKE excercise x(

28. WOULD YOU FALL IN LOVE KNOWING THAT THE PERSON IS LEAVING?
uh.. I can't really control that can I?

29. WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO TELL SOMEONE HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO YOU?
tell them in person? or give the person a call? or even write a note, i don't know, anything but sms or msn's, they seem too hard to convince

30. SAY A NUMBER FROM ONE TO A HUNDRED:
type or say? 65?

31. BLONDES OR BRUNETTES?
brunettes? depends.

32. WHAT IS THE ONE NUMBER YOU CALL OFTEN?
my mom's number? to pick me up from school

33. WHAT ANNOYS YOU MOST?
insects, creepy crawlies, disgusting slimy stuff, snakes.....ugh

34. HAVE YOU BEEN OUT OF THE U.S.?
have i even BEEN to US? NO

35. YOUR WEAKNESSES?
you don't want to know

36. TATER TOTS OR FRIES?
Tater Tots.

37. FIRST JOB?

house chores

38. EVER PRANK CALLED SOMEONE?
nope, but i think it'll be fun

39. WHAT WERE YOU DOING BEFORE YOU FILLED OUT THIS?
watching Bleach while eating pizza and telling myself i'll do homework after watching Bleach?

40. IF YOU COULD GET PLASTIC SURGERY WHAT WOULD IT BE?
nothing i guess, i never said i liked my features, but i don't hate it either

41. WHY DID YOU FILL OUT THIS SURVEY?
because i have too many post under draft?

42. WHAT DO YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ABOUT MOST?
lemme think.....erm, nothing in particular?

43. WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF ALCOHOL BECAME ILLEGAL?
nothing, as long as shandy's and rice wine's are still available

44. WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY?
erm, a nice sweet surprise?

45. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT?
never thought of that

46. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
not that i know of?

47. DO YOU WISH ON STARS?
uh huh, stars make everything feel magical

48. WHICH FINGER[S] IS YOUR FAVORITE?
i can't imagine my life without ANY of them?

49. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY?
few months?

50. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
not really, i used to get beating everyday when i was in standard 1 for bad hand writing...not that it helped

51. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
duck? or fried whatever meat with nice sauce

52. ANY BAD HABITS?
do i really have to list them?

53. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING CD ON THE SHELF?
uhm, none.

54. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
guess so, if you are desperate enough to not mind my really lame jokes

55. HAVE YOU EVER TOLD A SECRET YOU SWORE NOT TO TELL?
nope....i think, it might have slipped =P

56. DO LOOKS MATTER?
for first impressions, of course. do you know when we first meet somebody, the first 0.6 second is based on first impressions?

57. HOW DO YOU RELEASE YOUR ANGER?
glum around, or say really mean stuff to innocent people whom i will later regrett

58. WHERE IS YOUR SECOND HOME?
school? i spent half my( until now ) life there

59. DO YOU TRUST OTHERS EASILY?
yeah, too easily in fact, i mean, logically, LOGICALLY, why should a person lie for no reason?

60. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD?
a dusty, grey rabbit stuff toy? i still love it...

61. HOW MANY NUMBERS ARE IN YOUR CELL PHONE?
do i have to COUNT? erm, probably 60?

62. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
i'm getting better by the day =P

63. DO YOU KNOW ANYONE FAMOUS?
yes, of course! but they dont know me

64. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN A MOSH PIT?
yeah.. ..

65. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A GUY/GIRL?
depends....

66. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES?
erm, my brother's friends calls me aunty, due to some really stupid misunderstanding which left me pissed off and left them at the door step without opening the door to them

67. HOW MANY PAIRS OF SHOES DO YOU HAVE?
3 pairs, if this includes slipers and sandles, 6 then

68. DO YOU UN-TIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
no. why should you?

69. WERE YOU UPSET ABOUT STEVE IRWIN DYING?
no, not really. it just felt odd somebody cold be killed by a stingray like that....it WAS a stingray, right?

70. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR?
STRAWBERRY!!!!!! BERRY rocks!!!!!!

71. ARE YOU LAZY?
why else would this post be here for, what, 3 months?

72. WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE COLORS?

light purple, sky blue, light pink, vanilla...

73. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE BAND?
i don't have a favorite band..

74. HOW MANY WISDOM TEETH DO YOU HAVE?
4? but none of them are out yet....

75. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?
no, i'm in a generous mood today and i don't feel like toturing anybody....well, not yet

76. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
my mom talking to my bro about his results?

77. LAST THING YOU ATE?
pizza, dinner

78. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
a malay girl frm pizza hut to confirm the delivery whom annoyed me

79. WHAT'S THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX?
his face? Lol. the way he talk and stand? basically his body language

80. FAVORITE THOUGHT PROVOKING SONG:
?

81. FAVORITE THING TO HATE:
dissapointment? TAGSS????

82. FAVORITE DRINK:
mango lassi, ice blends, yogurt drink, milk shake, sweet stuff....,*shrug*

83. FAVORITE ZODIAC SIGN:
Sagittarius!

84. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SPORT

NONE

85. WHAT IS YOUR HAIR COLOR?
mostly black, and a little brown.......no WHITE!!!! =D

86. EYE COLOR?
dark brown.

87. DO YOU WEAR GLASSES?
NOPE, and i'm utterly proud about it

88. SIBLINGS?
two brothers

89. FAVORITE MONTH(s)?
November and December. because of holidays.

90. DO YOU LIKE SUSHI?
it's okay.

91. LAST THING YOU WATCHED?
pirates of carribean

92. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR?
18th of December!!!!

93. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?
depends who is the someone i'm asking out?

94. SUMMER OR WINTER?

winter , it's nice, if you are in warm clothings and drinking a cup of hot chocolate while watching the snow droplets fall

95. KISSES OR HUGS?
hugs.

96. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE-NIGHT STANDS?
relationships.

97. WHO IS THE MOST LIKELY TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?
i dunno, someone who's not as lazy as me?

98. WHO IS THE LEAST LIKELY TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?
someone who is busy and sick, like me?

99. Create your own question!
do you like doing tags? ans: nope, not really

100. IS ANYONE IN LOVE WITH YOU?
......duh?

**************************************************************************

and ta-da!!!!!! i'm done......till next time

eh??

2008-11-10T11:38:00.000+08:00

it's been ages since i last blogged, a month i guess? there are tons of things i want to blog about.....not to mention the few tags i owe elaine and becca which i'll have to press the button 'older post' a gazillion times to find it. == screw.

BUT, i'm not doing the tags today (though i skipped school today...but hey, the whole class isn't going...except for those with full attendance), half an hour before mom pops in to scream at me reminding me of how lazy i can be.....i'll try skipping that part and make myselve a GOOD girl and sweep and mop the floor.

before i end this though, i'll like to touch a bit on the class party two nights ago, on saturday night....it rocks. not to mention the jelly cake, chocolate cake and chocolate sponge plus cream cake which becca and ivy and....who else? bah, anyway, those who missed the cake, u missed it!!! i was great, too bad, lol. and also, elaine!!! and kit yee!!! why weren't u guys, i mean girls here? it was such fun!!

po chi was glued to the PS2 the whole night....==, but she won a few boys in naruto, resulting a very sore finger, but she's happy. oh yeah, not forgetting the guys who nearly stormed the house down( pity jean pheng and his family ) watching the match between arsenal and MU. how? well, from down stairs, it felt like EARTHQUAKE!!! just that it was from the top of our heads insted of the ground.

the house was nice, it had a fantastic view of KL and the whole of kuchai lama, i even saw our school!! i was happily enjoying the view while barbequeing for a few leeches who sat on thje table saying, hey, u might as well BBQ this too, and later hogged at the food and replying 'zhen shi thank Q ni arh, zhen shi thank Q ni arh' ( chinglish ) when i passed them the sausages. == , i really felt like trowing the sausages into the pond and feed the fishes instead.

becca was barbequeing with me to serve the those who love sausages. we ate some ourselves too =P. later, there was a match of pingpong between us ( more like badminton, lol) which teoh and wanqi later joined in. then i battled po chi in naruto which i lost while a whole buch of girls and soon leong and zan yi were snaping photos. becca crept upstairs to watch the football match, while the rest of the guys who weren't intrested in football were in the basement playing snooker.

i had great luck playin the cards with samantha and her gang......which i had always thought were quiet good goodie girls.....i even had a match of pingpong with them too ^^

overall, it was fun....and a surprise. hopefully, we can have more of this class parties......maybe during new year? somewhere high to see the fireworks? who's house next?? =D

PRS

2008-10-05T00:42:00.000+08:00

after being with PRS since form 1, the list of ajk's next year was finally announced. brought back nice memories of me when i first joined PRS and also all the activities which were held. i remember when i was in form 1, PRS was considered a popular club ( still is now), a whole bunch of us went for the interview to become a member. on the day the list was announced, i remember smilling at basically everybody when i saw my name there. not many passed the interview, in my class, less than 3 passed. then, it was the probation period. meetings, teachers' day singing....this time, less than 5 person in the same floor as i'm in managed to pass. i still remember seing ivy sniffing with a broom in her hands next class when i passed by. curious, i asked, she told me the list of PRS members who passed the probation period was out...less than 30 was on the list. worried, i rushed to see the list. no words could describe how relieved and proud i felt when i saw my name on the paper.

then, there was 'orentasi' in the beginning of the year, hari kerjaya and also singing for teachers' day as the major PRS activities participated by the form 2's. it was during that orentasi that i learn how to sing the lagu sekolah....why? cause WE, the form 2's had to teach the newcomers how to sing the lagu sekolah....( i dont blame them if they still can't sing it, cause i didn't know how to sig it too == )

form 3 was slightly more relaxing. form 3's were in charge of being group leaders, penolong, and also the secretary for that group during kursus tahunan. i missed that event cause i was in thailand, but i helped out every other way i knew.

this year, events that form 4's last year didn't organise was organised by us. example, hari PRS, the day where we invite PRS from other schools to gather around. and also, from this year onwards, form 4's have to help with the hari kerjaya.....which i thought was organised yearly by the form 2's? anyway, it was fun, so i basically didn't mind. but, gosh, kursus tahunan was tough. so many things to prepare, our brains were squeezed to the last bit, thinking of the games to play. then there was also majlis perpisahan, for the form 5's. it was an event we had to cover with a very limited budget. i think they ( those who buys the presents as well as the ones who ordered the food and set up everything to look like a real high class buffet ) did an extreamly good job, even the form 5's complimented this as thier best meal in thier years of attending majlis perpisahan. after everything was nearly over, it was time for the form 5's to anounce the next ajk's.

3 by 3, we were called out. some were called out twice. all the 3 called out were blindfolded with a water balloon on his/her head. the ajk will then poke the balloon of the chosen ajk. water will then be splashed from first floor to the lucky one.

at that moment, i could tell for sure, a small part of everybody wanted a post, but it was rather limited. most of us, including me, joined this club for fun in the beginning, but as the conflicts thickens with the work load, everyone would, consciously or unconsciously want something in return. kl, my very confident friend, was called out for the first post. i know her well enough to know she was rather disappointed and was hopping that she wont get that particular post, cause she was eying another higher post.

as expected, she didn't get that post, though she didn't show any expression, it was obvious she was smiling to herself. she was called out the second time, for ajk discipline. she got that one, though she eyed for something higher, she looked satisfied. good too, cause she's rather scary when she's fierce.

i got called out too. the first time, i din't know what to think, cause i wasn't sure if this was what i wanted.....suddenly, i heard water splashing, but it wasn't on me. i really didn't know whether to be relieved or upset....i wasn't even sure if i'll GET another chance to go out anymore. then, as the number of posts lessens, tension increases, people were getting worried.....it was down to the second last post.....and i was called out for the second time. this time, i knew, if i don't get this post, i'm not getting anything. now to think about it, why am i so unconsciously wanting this post? i guess, in a way, i wanted to have a place where i can train my social skills as well as to expose and train myself to more challenges.

so when my balloon burst, and water was poured till my shirt was dripping, i stood at the same place, stunned. then, i rushed on stage with an annoying grin on my face. if possible, i'd like to erase that grin off my face, it must made me look so show-off....but at that time, i was so happy, i didn't care.

when i got my golden badge, with my name there, that feeling, was priceless. i took the badge back with me to my chair and stared at it......

i am now the next naib pengerusi 1 for year 2009.

to think about it, it was rather a surprise. during the individual interview, which i had to go for twice, ( == ) they asked me if i wanted a post, so of course, i said yes. then, they asked me which post i wanted, know what i told them? i told them, that when i looked at the ajk list, i did not see any post that made my heart scream " i WANT that post!!!" so if u guys think there's a suitable 1 for me, i'll take it and work my best on it. i mean, if i want to go for a post, i'll usually go big, probably the first few post on the list, but i didn't DARE to dream big. wanting something and dreaming about something is really different. one might leave u in regret, and the other might just leave u in pain and swearing u wont try it again.

so now, i'm just glad and thankful to the ex-form 5's and teachers in charge who gave me this chance to TRY and dream big though i'm not very confident with myself. i'll definately try my best to bring PRS SMKSS to it's peak, like 2 years ago when i was in form 2. ( gosh, why am i sounding like I'M the pengerusi? == )

before going 2046 with friends after clearing up that day, the current naib pengerusi made an appointment with me to meet up with her so she can explain all my duties next year. though i think it'll be tiring, it's gonna be worth it.

PS, po chi was SO shocked i got naib pengerusi she joked that PRS wont be able to get champion for pameran this year ( >.< ) so we made a deal that if PRS DO get champion, she'll belanja me mcdonalds........ngek, ngek, ngek, i'll make sure we stay as champion next year.

i'm BACK

2008-10-04T22:17:00.000+08:00

after 6 days 5 nights trip to Cameron, i'm BACK!!!! back to mornings where u don't necessary find mist, back to eating vegetables and fruits that doesn't taste like they've been soaked in syrup, back to days where you cant even get fresh air or quiet moments on your own, back to mornings where u get up and rush around like mad cause you don't want to miss the school bus ( okay, so i always get up late, but i'm tired >< ) but on the OTHER hand, you dont have to wear a sweater and yet freeze all day long, AND you dont have to use a hairdrier to heat the bed up a bit before you even sleep ( it's 19.5 degrees, averagely)

supposingly, it was a STUDY trip, for the coming finals ( NO~~~~~><) but, it ended up to be more of a FATTENING trip........( idontNEEDtheextrapounds) , i didn't really manage to study as much as i wanted, to be more specific, i wasted the first day cause i was busy unpacking and wasn't really motivated. then, i wasted another day, being emo ( simple words gets me thinking, and sometimes, when u start thinking TOO much, u either get emo, or feel TOO pround of yourself.... i usually end up with the first ). Then, i wasted the last day unpacking and feeling how lucky i am to still be alive.....seriously, if i am a cat and had 9 lives, i'll be down to my second last life now. don't believe me? well, i nearly drowned 4 times ( i knocked out in one of them ), i nearly got knocked down by a car twice, and during my trip to thailand, an accident in the theme park left me hanging in the mid air for quite some time, which i myself can't believe how i manage to survive. ( suddenly feel so pround of myself xD ) And some people wonder why cant i swim == well, at least i still enjoy splashing around, and i totally believe in living my life to the fullest. ( i want to try bungee jump, white water rafting, sky diving, and many many many many more.....guess nine lives' just isn't enough for me =P)

anyway, the main point is that i am now officially BACK in KL......andexamsareinlessthan24hours....no~~~~~><

PS: it's good to sleep on my own bed with my soft toys and my pillows.....^^

............(part 2)

2008-09-25T23:00:00.000+08:00

i must be out of my mind to be typing so many post's in a day >,> but, it's legal right? =P

you know, it's been odd, how almost every class i go, the class i'm in will be the talk among the teachers...as in how 'GREAT' the students are. guessed i'm jinxed....?

last year, the same teacher taught me Chinese, truthful speaking, she's a seriously good teacher, i mean, you can see that she tried hard to communicate with our class but it's not just about trying hard, there was just....nothing.....somehow, it just did not working out. i guess i'm partly responsible for being too engrossed in reading The Star newspaper sometimes till i don't even realize her existence. BUT, i gotta say, the stories she tell, are SO.....FANTASTIC, i just makes me fly into the world where emperors rule over the kingdom, in HUGE palaces , people still using carts to do all the transfering, girls walk around timidly in long....dresses?

back to topic. last year, during the anual debate competition, ( which i eagerly took part ) i was shocked to know that our team's first round will be against a group of my friends, one of them was considered my closest. i was emotionally helpless, and shock till the extend of thinking whether i should just quit.

then, few days before the competition, she told me she might just quit. shocked, i asked her why. she told me she didn't want our friendship to face problems because of a competition. somewhere in me, i was rlieved, i didn't want to compete my friend, even if it's only a friendly match. but this wasn't what i wanted, i knew it myself, she should NOT quit because of this problem, she takes this competition as seriously as i did, so why should SHE quit and not me??

on judgement day, she said she decided to join in, and made me promise nothing would change after this. recess that day, i was rather left out, all of them were in the same class, and this is a class to class competition, they had stuff to chat about, about what are the going to say during the competition....and, I, was, the, competition. i felt sad, but po chi said this kind of thing was normal, bear with it.

minutes before the competition, one of my friends told me jokingly, '' go prepare yourself a coffin, cause u're going down.'' i was somehow upset, even though i knew she was joking. i thought friends gave each other support when they need it? i even heard from a few saying that thier teacher told them, ''dont worry, that class is lazy, i bet they didn't even prepare anything.'' i was heartbroken, even the teacher's not confident in us....

anyway, we won. but lost in the second round. ( due to some really madden'ing cause = = ) everything was back to normal.

.........................................................how DID i get HERE???

i thought i was talking about teachers and how Pn. T, Pn. Fr, Mr. L got mad with us???? oh, sheesh, whatever, i'm ending the post, gotta sleep, eyebag problem ><.

chiao.......................................

...........

2008-09-25T22:26:00.000+08:00

i seriously have NO idea what am i doing here but, yeah, feels odd to be blogging again, has been quite awhile. in case some of u are wondering, (not that i think any of u would be anyway ) what's with my last post? ..........it wasn't suppose to be like that!!!! ><

it all started on 1 fine day where i had extra time and decided to blog. half an hour later, when i finally published it, the internet disconnected.......NO~~~~~!!!!!!! apparently, it was disconnected for quite some time already, just that i didn't realize......blurrr....so nothing was automatically saved in draft and i decided i was too lazy to retype everything.

*PS, this is the forth time i'm typing this already............i really salute my own patience x.x

online...finaly....]

2008-09-15T22:19:00.000+08:00

updates^^

2008-08-23T14:48:00.000+08:00

currently crazing over 'vampire knight' animation that is, ( onemanga very slow >< ) i realised the animation and the original story is quite the same, unlike some other animations ( black cat )....which is goood. also, another manga i'm crazing over now is ' gakuen alice' also known as alice academy. fantastic story i tell u =DDDD, extreamly funny, though a bit expected. still i LOVE it^^

well, why wouldn't i? it's another supernatural story^^. oh yeah, a forward mail on the horoscopes i recieved from mr.J.... i found mine quite true^^ ( not that i'm suppose to be happy >< ) anyway, if i use the same one on becca who is also in the same horoscope as i'm in.....i don't think the descriptions would fit her.....xD

class party

2008-08-21T10:34:00.000+08:00

BBQ class party
date: 16th august 2008 ( last saturday, few days late lol)
venue: tat sheng's house ( somewhere in tmn desa, semi-D, >< gosh, it's big.....+ nice)
time: 6:30pm ( reached at 7.30pm+ ><)

was staring at 2 sets of clothes on my bed since 4pm (?)......which one to wear ><. finally decided i'll go for the simple+classical choice.....jeans with t-shirt. then came another question...is there gonna be any water involved? do i have to bring any extra clothes? (5pm)................k, probably just grab a shirt with shorts in case things get messy. ( 6pm)

went downstairs, watched TV till someone called me on my phone ( cant rmb who) and basically shock myself. 7pm!!!! got everyone to get ready to go out, lock up and left house at 7.15pm (?)

reached tat sheng's house and stared.....i never knew he was THAT rich......swt. anyway, went in and was surprised to see only 10 people, maybe more, but at first sight, it was rather quiet. found myself a seat, and was rather numb at what to do next. i saw empty domino pizza boxes, empty cups and a basically empty table.

turning to the left, saw wei ming barbecuing some chicken wings all by himself . so, i got myself a cup, filled with 7up+sunkist+ice drink. then, po chi kinda pulled me in with her to explore the house.

it was so....nice, reminds me of a palace....=P (especially the rounded window) especially love the bar too^^. after exploring everything, i went out to look around. noticing that wei ming was still beside the electrical griller, i decided maybe i should help out.

the moment the fish was ready and taken out to the rest, it was gone in less than 10 minutes......== (no wonder there was no food when i came. . . . ) the electric griller was STUPID >< it took so long to cook something that burns easily ( of course, it still burns stuff if u leave it there for half an hour without bothering about it)

when kit yee finally came, we surprised her with a birthday cake and a floor full of balloons( thank the boys for those^^ they had a hard time). during game time, i crept out, why? u might ask....well, the food outside needs grilling =P

so...i crept out and started grilling the rest of the food. just then, po chi came out too, she wasn't interested in the games. so, we both got ourself a seat beside the griller and chat. or should i say, i grilled while chatting, she ate while chatting. but after griling the corns, i realiased to my amazement, i haven't eaten. ( 9.30pm) gosh, how in the world did i survive the few hours before?

SO, me and po chi ended up beside the griller, eating, chatting and grilling^^. it was fun =) was a long time since i had a chat like that with her, kinda forgot how it felt. when games were over, everyone came out to eat....only to find not much food was left ( hehe...we ate alot, though we grilled a lot too) oh yeah, the lamb steak i was eying was fantastic. pity becca wasn't there. po chi and i had 1 each =P most other people had to share the rest. ( cause there wasn't many.....hey, no complains to u all who weren't out there to book a lamb steak early)

at around 10, 11pm people started going home......( pity the maid that have to do the cleaning up)

P/S. if we ever have class party again, i'm voting to go tatt sheng's house again.....or maybe to some other of our rich classmates' house.......*hint* *hint*

Tags..........= =

2008-08-10T21:11:00.000+08:00

becca....sometimes u CAN be quite annoying, you know i never fancied tags? BUT......u DID put in the photos of Remy here which i forgot to take before i gave him to you and then back to lee xian....so.....i forgive u^^ ( see? i'm so kind =P ) before i do the tag though, i have something to say....jen hoe, so sorry, the tag u tagged me dunno-how-long-ago is still in my draft, killed thousands of brain cells just to answer the first few question....>< style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);">

1. Each player of this game starts off with 15 weird things/habits/little known facts about yourself.
2. People who get tagged need to write a blog of their own 15 weird things/habits/little known facts as well as state this rule clearly.
3. At the end, you need to choose 10 people to be tagged and list their names.
4. No tags back!!

----------------------------

1. i can eat up to 4 types of fruits a day ( highest record- 1 whole papaya, 1 fuji aple, 1 orange, 3-4 bananas)

2. i can sleep through the day when i'm terribly tired or that i'm in a bad mood ( 24 hours without waking up )

3. i can make everybody in a group to feel grumpy or emo when i'm in a bad mood ( which explains why i switch off my phone and lock my room door when i'm in one )

4. i have serious mood swing problems ( don't be surprise to find me happy and then mad or sad or even excited in a few seconds......one of a kind^^ )

5. i'm hyperactive =D ( my victims: becca, po chi...[mainly her =P] )

6. i'm currently crazy'ing over animations and mangas ( vampire knight....ahhhh!!!! cat street....ahhhh!!!!!! hell girl.....ahhhhh!!!!! )

7. i have an extreme sweet tooth

8. i don't wear specs......( extremely proud^^ the only 1 in the family, for now, that is....)

9. i used to be afraid to go near my room window, or to even pull open the curtains in my room for a few years after i had this crazy dream of a scary, crooked nosed witch that kidnapped me.

10. i dont eat pills.....to be more specific....i cant swallow pills ><

11. i love....simply love soft toys!!!!

12. i used to wear braces when i was in form 3 ( wearing *supposingly* retainer now, but, i dont really bother so it's a bit crooked. )

13. i still in a way live in my own small fantasy world

14. i show a different part of me to people who i somehow think will not meet again

15. i'm a computer illetrate. ( typed this post TWICE cause there was some technical problem )

btw, i DONT MAKE suffer(tags)::
everyone else whom i know that also hate tags....u're safe^^

------------------------------------

thus ends my post

P/S- Beijing Olympics opening ceremony 2 day ago was fantastic!!! especially the 29 'foot steps' and the torch lighting part

updates

2008-07-31T18:02:00.000+08:00

Thursday today and going to have tuition in another 1 hour or so ( replacement ) so...just before the class with both my bro n mom not here at home......BLOG!!!!!

firstly, I'd like to boast a bit....just a tiny little bit....about the EST presentation on Tuesday. It was GREAT!!!! it was delayed for 2 whole weeks, the first week cause i left my notes i found on the net at home, ( my bad >< ) and the second week cause teacher was sick. ( i was so prepared >< ) anyhow, on Tuesday, the day right after the busy busy pameran day, we ( becca, me n po chi ) nearly totally forgot about the presentation......(for this case, i think it's me only who forgot) anyway, becca drew the picture of the long bone on the board before teacher come in. though i made some mistakes with those scientific term here and there, i think we did ok....except for the part where i changed the arrow of the word 'epiphisis' to 'metaphisis' and change it back again to 'epiphisis' and doubted and change again for i dunno how many times ><

teacher say it was a great presentation but she corrected a fact or two and commented that she learned a lot and wasn't sure if the facts were right as she doesn't know the facts herself. ( . . . . . . ) so...that was it, god knows why in the first place did i spend so much time on a presentation which will not be a part of any exam....== oh yeah, before i end the part of this post on the est presentation, i'd like to thank becca very much for helping out ( though this is a group project but... ) and also to po chi!!! who acted as modal when i turned her around(360 degrees...."u turned her for like 380 degrees lorh" commented becca) in front of the class showing which part of our bones are flat bones, long bones, irregular bones, semisamoid bones...ect. ( sorry ya =P )

wednesday.....everything was normal....class ended at 1.50....had tuition.........

thursday....today...i found out from a friend who sat in the same bus i was to school about what happened yesterday....2pm, at the staircase i walked pass with becca n yevone few minutes ago the previous day......a tragedy.......one that caused the stairs to be locked up....one that became the hot topic of the school for i-dunno-how-long, one that caused a few of my classmates a sleepless night, one that cause some people to reveal their hideous part of them......

i dont think i have any right though to reveal what actually happened, so dont ask....but this is something i will definitely remember though i wasn't involved.

PS. Remy the rat....is extreamly cute.......i brought it to school today...and it got more attention then i did!!! >< nvm, i do understand why....he's so....CUTE!!!! so...i'll forgive u Remy^^

PRS Race

2008-07-13T21:03:00.001+08:00

first and foremost, not an event by form 4's prs.....but i cant remember the date >< though i remember quite well what happened =D

i came to school at 12pm, brought my god-knows-why-i-still-keep-it 'pom-pom', for the cheer performance later by every group. i'm in group 7, and is the unfortunate setiausuha...TT (all the 3 form 4's in each team has a post). anyway, reached there, said 'hi' and saw the performance they were getting ready. everything was quite okay, i gave my comments, gave a bit of suggestions, 'show off' a bit =P and we made a great team!!! yeah~~^^ . most teams skipped the 'stun' part, but our team came with a package of "small n energetic" "big and strong" and "tall and sporting" and best of all, they are all a good sport and is willing to make small sacrifices for the team. BONUS= most are active PRS members^^ so, we managed to do the 2 stuns as well as the 4 formations to result a great performance.

i was really happy by the end of the practice and acted a bit crazy....(don't mind me) we had lunch together and prepared for the performance. 15 minutes before performance, we, the 3 form 4's decided to join in the dance =D (we could choose not to)

though i keep quiet all this time, i was quite confident we could win the cheer. all of a sudden, it started raining, but the event went on as usual.....30 minutes later. it started with the cheer performance as the station games cant b held during the rain. though there was a little tech problem in the middle, everything else was quite good i dare say.

the station games were ok, but there was a little problem at the back where 4 teams clashed. in the end, the winner was chosen through a few basketball shoots...........we lost.

anyway, when the results was announced, we DID get the best cheer performance. we were all very happy when we went on stage to receive the hamper^^. we shared it among ourselves before we left.

notes= >< my abdomen muscle hurt like hell the next day

my com is bac......finally

2008-06-26T19:39:00.000+08:00

Tadaa~~~i'm back.....after 2 weeks of torture TT, plenty to post about but too little time so, yeah, i'll probably shorten them n skip some of them.....btw, most of the events below were so....long ago, i cant recall when was it. =P

1) fantastic fall

will u believe it if i told u i half fall half slide past 2 metres? bet a dollar u wont believe *on second thoughts, i'm taking that back* nyway, i did. unbelievable huh? well, believe it, cause i did, ask becca, ask elaine, ask po chi, they saw. what actually happened was, that morning, (the morning school reopened) when we came to our class, a surprise awaited us.....the class was empty....so...the whole class spent the first 2 periods finding can-be-used tables n chairs. we searched the whole block-E, no luck, so we tried other blocks. as we were going down the stairs(last two flights)...*time slows down* i tripped, was about to fall when i grabbed hold of a rusty black pole beside me, tried to pull myself up when i fell AGAIN because i wasn't steady and skidded through the corridor but was able to use my hand as a brake just in time to save myself from having my face hit the floor.

first comment i got? " you ok?" yeah, that's normal. second comment "wow, did u fall? i thought u were doing a performance or some sort *giggles* " . . . . . . . . THAT, was cruel >< oh well, luckily no bruise or anything. ( dun ask me how i did it )

2) that day, i cant rmb which day, becca was telling me about her nightmare. So, since she told me her's, i thought it only fair to tell her mine too. BUT.....no way i'm telling it here. but since then, i've always thought....why am i the only one who get such odd dreams? oh well, as long as it doesn't haunt me again, i'm perfectly fine.

3) another that day, that i cant remember, quek was asking me...."can u immagine how u were when u were in form 1?" i was dumbstruck, but before i know it, i think i mumbled something about, "yeah, i knew i changed...." after that, they( quek, qi.... those with me since form 1 ) started laughing and teasing about those really 'fish' stuff i said and did when i was in form 1 and 2. the whole week after that, i kept thinking....how much did i change? how did i change? was these changes good? or bad?

eventually, i asked my friends who knew me quite well. i got all sorts of funny answers. some told me i didn't change, just that i got naughtier ( so that's bad ). i asked my parents too, thier answers? cant rmb... Still, i knew i changed, even if nobody in this world ever realized that. i knew a lot more thing that i never knew in form 1. i knew this world isn't a fantasy world where everyone live together in peace and harmony. i knew that in the REAL world, the world i never did like to admit i was living in, has plenty of sad stories. i knew that i can be happier than i ever was if i learn to accept the world as it is. i knew that friends, really spice up your life. i also learn that friends, can break your heart as easily as they want.

in a way, all the things that happened, was, as some people would say, a kind of training, or lesson...the hard way. changes are hard, as they bring a lot of sorrow and tears in the process. but in the end, i dare say i'm more matured than before and is more willing to face the world.

3).....actually, i have plenty....PLENTY to say, to share but kinda forgot, so, that's about it

oh yeah, something i remembered reading from our English litriture, ' we can only make our decisions based on past experience, present circumstances and hope for the future...' very true, as i can say that i hold quite a lot of hope for the future, a future where everyone is happy and content. therefore, i make choices which i think, and hope, MAKES a difference.

computer

2008-06-14T22:36:00.000+08:00

definition for 'computer' is, something not many gen Y can live without. so....i have no idea how in the world did i do it^^ i did not even TOUCH the computer for....a whole long WEEK!!!! congratulate me please =D

my old com, burned.....== yeah, it burned. my bro said he smelled something burning last monday and~~~ the monitor died.......TT my bro was so mad( cause his cabal was still on ) he hit the com dunno how many times.....at 5.30am( he was playin com the whole night, not that he woke up THAT early ) that my whole family woke up.

when asked what happened, he said the com burned n now, he cant do his project...(yeah right...==) my mom's first reaction? good lorh, ' dai sei ' ( serve u right ) who ask u to on com all day without off'ing for a few months? always oni off monitor....

right....so now, u might just b wondering why am i even blogging now? or how am suppose to be blogging now.....the thing is

my dad bought a new monitor!!!!!!^^ arh~~~~~~~~~~^^ extreamly nice, flat screen =D ( for those of u who has been using flat screen since dunno when, dont splash cold water on me == i'm still in a terribly good mood )

well, that's about it......oh, jh, about the tag, am working on it, but maybe not so fast, will take some time....sorry ya ><

anime

2008-06-05T23:58:00.000+08:00

i just finished watching 'hell girl season 2' animation which i borrowed from lee xian( a really sweet girl, but she'll ask me to go die if she hears me say that, i have no idea why ) 3 hours ago................the ending? it's sad....

she died in the end, died being hit by the residents of the city......sad TT......i was crying even though i watched it twice, my younger bro was crying with me too, but only when he watched it the first time. ( i didn't even realise till the show was over and he asked me if i cried )

to all of u who probably haven't heard of it before or dont bother to watch this animation....please allow me to summuries this for u.

yanma ai ( that's what the subtitle says ) is the hell girl, every day during midnight, anybody who has someone they hate very much can get through a website, on the net to connect with hell girl. if the person doesn't really hate the other person that much, or that the person is going to this site for other reasons other than taking revenge, the person will not be able to get through. when the person gets through, he/she types in the name of the person he/ she hates and hell gir will appear. she will then hand the 'client' a straw dolly and explains the conditions....those who curses others to hell, will also end up in hell too. meaning, if u ask the help of hell girl to send someone to hell, when u die, u will go to hell too, but it's after u die. the contract will not be made till the red string on the dolly is pulled.

in the first season, those who were sent to hell was understandable. like there was this ep when a high school girl sent a vet to hell cause he doesnt really care bout the sick animals unless it was going to make him any richer or any more famous. though i find sending ppl to hell like that is still kinda selfish, and reminds me of death note ( i support L by the way ) but i dont think that it is worth it. i mean, these ppl who do bad things are gonna be sent to hell after all, but it's after they r dead, so y send yourself to hell too just so that he/she dissapears earlier?

near the middle of season one, a reporter gets in the story. somehow, his daughter has hell girl's eye, means she can sometimes see what hell girl sees. so, the reporter with the help of his daughter, tries to stop ppl from sending others to hell.

in the end of season 1, hell girl's past was told, how she become hell girl....thanks to an idiotic hell boy who could bring back the deepest part of ur memory that u try to forget. So, hell girl used to be a normal girl, with red eyes....all the villagers thinks she's a devil, but she has a friend, a boy who believes she's innocent. the villagers find ways and reason to kill her. in the end, they tied thier whole family, blindfolded them and trew them into a hole. Ai's blindfold was lose, and saw herself being burried alife.....by the boy she thought was her friend..

i have no idea how, but she came back to lifeand burned the whole village. everyone was killed, except for the boy who managed to escape. the king of hell treaten to put all her loved one into the darkness forever if she doesn't become hell girl.

apparently, the reporter is the boy's great-great-great( dunno how many great )........grandson. so, when hell girl was in a bad mood ( i think ) she gave the reporter's daughter a straw dolly and ask her to sent her father to hell, telling her the whole story how her mother died. Ai's plot nearly succeded but the little girl forgave her father when her father appologised and cried in regret.

hell girl saw and her heart soften. her hate for the villager that killed her kinda reduced, and she returned to hell to do her job.

THAT is season 1....as for season 2.....it's a long story but my bro is nagging me to let him use the com so.....c how larh, anyone intrested? i'll tell u personally^^

snakes o.o ( part 2 )

2008-06-05T13:18:00.000+08:00

today, when i was busy minding my own buisness......a green snake slithered into my front door!!!! ><

.........................k, it was a lie =P i was too bored okay.......

this was what actually happened.....

this morning, when my mom was teaching my brother past perfect and present perfect tense or something like that, my brother was, as usual finding ways to escape. and so....

my bro: mom mom wait, let me say first, let me say first
mom : u want to say something, say it during ur break time, dont interupt me when i'm teaching
my bro: but mom~~~ *shaking n pulling my mom's hand*
mom : no but's, now...past perfect tense are used when.......... for example.........
my bro: but mom, u dont understand *interupting*
mom : dont understand WHAT? *starting to lose her patience to a noisy child*
my bro: daniel say he saw a snake skin in the tree outside.
mom : really? *stares at me*
my bro: yala....and then hor......*continue saying alot of things that i didn't bother to listen*
me : oh my gosh.....so that's what happen to the birds eggs.....*putting the newspaper down*
mom : what bird? oh, u mean that bird, i totally forgot about it.....
me : ....remember the last time i told u the bird's egg dissapeared? the second batch? the batch i didn't even had time to take photo of? when i peeked in, there wasn't even a single trace of shells there....i ven took a photo of the empty nest....
mom : so u mean the snake actually slithered all the way to that bamboo plant?
me : uh huh.....
mom : .........* giving me the omg look*
me : oh my gosh...i saw the two yellow birds that grew up in our house there ytd,in the tree
mom : making a nest?
me : *nod*
mom : *sigh* i hope the birds are smart enough....anyway, from now on, close the glass every night.....just in case

i hope the birds safe.....and that the snake wont come here again ><

> <

2008-06-03T12:55:00.000+08:00

omg omg omg omg omg.............i broke something, AGAIN >< .....and it's the second time i did it.....my mom's already in a bad mood, she's so gonna explode >< plus, it's my dad's stuff, now even my dad's gonna kill me

help~~~!!! anyone know how to cure butter-fingers? ><

.......

2008-06-01T21:27:00.001+08:00

the new pencil box my mom bought me two weeks ago, which costs around rm30....is gone TT
my mom was so upset and so am i. i have like 3 g-2 gel pens inside, and all my other precious mechanical pencils, pens which i've had with me since i was in primary school....all gone!!! T^T
the other pencils, erasers, gel pens inside was quite new too....i bought them for the exams...
i guessed i left it in school after the kursus prs, and since amy was going to school on saturday, i asked her to help me find it. she went to school all 9 sth in the morning to help me find it (touched) but it wasn't found any where.....

waah~~!!!! my new, nice pencil box with my precious stationeries.... gone!!!!

last minute preparations for kursus tahunan prs 2008

2008-06-01T16:11:00.000+08:00

these events took place from 11am on 24th of may 2008, till 7am 26th of may 2008.

i dont really know how to start, but on 24th, it was more of last minutes discussion, who do what. KL thought that our detective game lack of characters, as there are only 4 main characters, so she asks us to gather around to think of a new 1.

the ajk's indirectly put us in charge in making the whole thing again, which kinda frustrates me cause i ended up writing everbody's ( 11 character's ) script, which took me till 4am in the morning.( i dont even work THIS hard for exams >< ) why? cause those who were helping with the story could not come the next day, which is also the last day to prepare, so since i was coming they trew all the script writing, the crime scene.....ect to me. i was so busy writing the scripts n thinking of the evidence found in the crime scene, i took my precious note book out with me for dinner to write while eating. my family wasn't very happy bout this, cause they say that i shouldn't be working so hard on sth even the ajk's dont bother about, i dont get any credit for this anyway. nevertheless, i finished by the next morning, though i knew what my family was telling me during dinner was true. but i did call becca that night to complain a bit, made me feel better. thanks becca^^ the next day, 25th, was also a busy day. so busy in fact, that nobody was free enough to hear me explain the new detective story. ( will post another blog on the story) everybody was getting thier own stations ready, though there were a few stations which needed extra people. for example, the maze, which uses 2 classrooms. ( meaning *destroying* the board in between the classes ) oh yeah, a form 4 prs who never came for any of our form 4 kursus meeting came, quite a surprise. by morning 26th of may, all the tougher to make stations were ready, everybody was under quite a lot of pressure as all of us wanted it to be as perfect as possible, i personally thought nothing would have gone wrong, but everyone else was expecting something to go wrong, but hoped nothing would. Y invited us to try out the maze they just finished building, excited, i tried it out with E. the maze was amazing, they made it real nice, but...it was 6am in the morning when i tried it out and the lights weren't switched on as the switch was...some where in the middle of the maze. it was erm, scary.....the classroom curtain swept pass me when the wind was blowing. THAT kinda freaked me. i made Y promise that he wont play any prank on us, but he added that if anything did happen, scream.

anyway, nothing happened and y came in to join us in finding our way out of the maze some time later.

at around 7 am, the empty hall was half full, the buku aturcara(diffrent compared to the pass few years but nice) was given out at the registration counter. all teams started to prepare for thier bentangan(where the groups explain thier group name, tepukan.....and will be asked a lot of questions)

we were prepared with thier breakfast and the kursus tahunan prs 2008 SMKSS by the form 4's prs started with CH and CC as host at 8am.(supposingly 7:30am, but, oh well...)

Theme? Superheroes.

PS. our form 4 prs T-shirt this year, is so...nice^^

teacher's day

2008-06-01T15:57:00.000+08:00

as always, late post, so......drift yourself back to....23rd of may 2008, friday.

teacher's day, not something i look forward to, except for being able to ponteng school that day, that is. =D
today, there was suppose to be quite a lot of plans, but all cancelled last minute. but not last minute enough for me to ponteng school though. xxx, whom i haven't spoken to in a long time called me, n ask if i was going to go to school, after i said yes, she immediately ask if i can help her pass up her moral project, which was due tomorrow. so, i said ok.
few minutes ltr, amy called to tell me that our plans for tomorrow's cancelled.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
so...even though there was nth to do, i still had to go to school, to pass up other ppl's project.

luckly the hari guru event's werent as boring as it usually is.

2nd term exams officially over

2008-06-01T13:29:00.000+08:00

well, erm, as usually, another late post.
lets pretend u r reading this post on....22nd of may 2008....is it? anyway, it's a thursday, and the sun's shinning, the birds r chirpping, i even saw some birds having sand bath *i think* in the sand pit. ^^
just as i was happily day dreaming bout how to enjoy my holidays in the packed class room filled with students of other classes, (due to accounts exam [poor becca =P]) , pn.buvanese came in. after being persuaded by some add-math genius, she announced that she'll return the add math exam papers.
i was too busy reading manga at that time,( the manga borrowed frm wan yee, ''fei bu qi de mo nv'' is real nice xD, n thier clothes r extreamely cute =D )i didn't know what happened untill po chi asked me bout my add math result.
i squeezed in the crowd and waited fo my paper. honestly, i was quite confident this time, as i knew how to do most of the questions.
i got my paper....i double check to confirm that it is really my paper....and went back to read comic books. *sad music in the back ground*
........well, i barely pass, but i did, and the marks were 20 over marks less then the first exam.
i had no idea what actually happened and how did i manage to get such results but, i not really satisfied about one of the questions where i got the right answers, and all the steps correct, but, i skipped one step. because of that, teacher gave me a big 0 for the whole thing. that question costs 4 marks.
suddenly i wasn't that happy anymore.
but, holidays are holidays, i kinda forgot bout the exams result the next day. why? cause i have prs kursus tahunan to worry about........

2nd class party

2008-05-09T00:03:00.000+08:00

was held on wednesday, yesterday...

as usuall, the cream trowing, sweets feast was unavoidable. =D

class party was something like a 'wish u guys good luck in the second term exam' thing, by our lovely class teacher^^

and also to thank our chinese teacher who's not gonna teachea us next semester TT

nyway, gave her a thank you card and messed around with the cake.

few girls escaped before the rest of the class was trapped in to 'play' the cream game. Becca could have been saved from the attacks, but she was too busy reading Star Two in a corner, and was noticed.

unlucky me was used as a revenge item for those who got whipped around with cream and couldn't counter.

P/S...exam week ><

snakes?? o.o

2008-05-01T01:23:00.000+08:00

last week or so, i was just telling becca how happy i was that the bird came back, to make a new nest^^ then yesterday, my younger brother told me the eggs dissapeared.....!? o.o he even told me that the mother bird must have took it away to it's new nest....

i obviously didn't believe him. how is it possible that a bird as big as my palm( i don't have giant hands btw ) with it's tiny legs(?) possibly transport it to another place? its like asking u to carry a stone as big as a chair using ur....erm....mouth? without any help. even if ur teeth r strong enough, how r u gonna carry it?

anyway, it's impossible.

so, after dinner, i quietly made my way to it's nest. the bird wasn't there. n to mention it, i dont think i heard any birds chirping lately nor have i seen the mother bird flying home to it's nest lately. this wasn't good, cause according to my my past experince, the mother bird will usually fly back to sleep at around 5pm. latest by 6pm. it's around 9pm now.

i wasn't tall enough to take a good view of the nest, so i got a chair n managed my way up. suddenly, sth moved around in between the flower pots. i didn't really bother. so i peeked in to the nest.

the eggs weren't there.

i couldn't believe my eyes, i mean, how could it just disappear? we have seen a few casses where the mother bird flies off leaving the nest n eggs behind, but never seen before a case where the eggs dissapear totally. i even got myself a torch but couldn't find any trace of broken egg shells. it disappeared totally.

i was kinda freaked out because the first possibility that came to my mind was that somehow, an animal manage to get it's way up to eat the 2 eggs. and the first animal that came to my mind that does this kind of thing, is a snake....

something moved in between the flower pots again. immediately, i got myself off the chair, and ran into the house. top speed.

i hope i dont see any snakes ><

bio peka

2008-04-20T20:34:00.000+08:00

i forgot...hehe, last thursday....was it? anyway, our bio experiment was a huge sucess, thanks to chi^^

the experiment was bout the enzymes, to prove that the enzymes in our saliva changes starch to glucose. the model experimental answer was to take 8 minutes for the first reaction, but we took only 3. that was so fast, but the teacher did mentioned that it could also be that the starch was quite diluted, but that was still fast!!

well, quite busy lately so...till then^^

P/S ...becca....chi....sorry ya....dun think i can pass up my work by tmr ><
just recovered^^ from flu n sore throat, yeah^^

><

2008-04-20T20:08:00.000+08:00

today's lunch sucks cause.........i cooked it with my dad xD

dad bought all the stuff to cook yesterday, though i hav no idea why...i went into the kitchen to have a drink this afternoon and was asked to fry the eggs...eh???

having no idea what was happening except that my dad was preparing the ham n sausages while i fried the eggs. Dad was like checking on me n complaining that i put too little oil to fry the eggs( ya meh? ) so i added oil n...." wat r u trying to do???u think the oil free gah??".........that was my mom, she came in to check n scolded me for adding oil...haih.

the ham turned out really oily, but i didn't dare to tell dad, n i didn't want mom to c everything so oily, so i usedthe kitchen roll n sucked off the oil on the plate n the excess oil on every slice of ham...haih....

dad added cubed potatoes into the baked beans..."dy, u have to cook the potatoes first before u cook the baked beans.." i think he did cook the potatoes first before adding the baked beans...?

the potatoes? turned out crunchy....i think u understand huh? even i, a potato lover didn't eat a lot of it.....

u know, mom's cooking r still the best^^

sports day

2008-04-13T20:23:00.000+08:00

woke up at 4am, stared at my room ceiling and said, well today's the day where 4 months of practice is gonna pay off. got up, went to bathroom, brush teeth....blablabla......then, as i was tying my hair, and suddenly ouch....my abdomen muscle hurts....guessed i practiced my bridge a bit too much yesterday...

went to school at 5am, raining, jam all the way to school. reach a 5.30am. 1 of the girls ran over and ask ''where's ur skirt?'' ''in my bag?'' ''give it to me now!!'' right, cool, sure, why'd u need it for anyway? then they told me, we need to cut n sew it, now. WHAT??? what 4? Cause teacher complain the skirt too ''tight'' , have to snip off one of the sides so it's not so tight n also to show that there's another pair of thights inside( it's the kind of skirt with a pair or thights inside ), not just the skirt.....swt....goverment school, malaysia...i mean, who(normal thinking people) would dance without another pair of shorts inside if u are wearing a skirt? (unless u have other motives ==)

so we ( me n another few girls ) had to rush, n surprise, i just realised, not many girls can sew. i thought everybody knew how to sew....properly, with the traditional needle n thread (n my mom complains i cant sew)....then, we changed into our "uniform''? (combination of last year's blue house shirt n the last minute sew-ed skirt) looks ok i guess. As i went back, another girl told me "tie your hair higher!!" huh? isn't this high enough? i just had a hair cut last week, how high do u want me to tie my hair? so i tied again, n was just about to do sth else when she came running to me with a blue-air pollution chemical.....hair spray. NO!!!!!!!! i hate this kind of thing, having chemicals put on my precious hair to damage n harden it, is a big no-no. but she ran after me with that chemical n shouted "spray few hours cant do any damge to your hair la!!!" but it can do damage to the ozone layer....(since when am i so environmentle friendly?) she caught me (slow runner) n sprayed that thing at my hair, i shut my eyes n feel that thing going through my hair...yuck... they even wnted to put makeup for us....the rest of them was ok with it, but i rubbed mine off immediatelly, how can i stand having powdery stuff going into my skin and dunno do what knid of damage to my precious, pimple-free, smooth, perfect skin texture???

i changed my shoe on the bus on the way to cheras football stadium, (brought 2 cause was raining n din want my shoe for cheer to b wet) got into our lines for pembarisan (marching). watched other houses get ready. Red was....all the people wear the kind of straw hat u c farmers wear in China but it's painted red. Green was even cooler, they made some kind of bamboo seat like the kind u c the king sit on in olden days in china? yup, tat's the kind. then somebody sits on it with 4 dressed up sakai's carrying that bamboo seat with the person on top. the bamboo thing was even covered in leaves...

Blue house was the first house to march out. i actually think we did ok, but after singing the lagu wilayah n lagu sekolah in the hot 9am sun, we marched to the front n keluar baris. Immediately, our commander cried, she was so upset, she thinks it's not neat enough...

my parents say they want to come, so i asked our cheerleader's ketua, she says our performance is probably at 10am, so i sms'ed them. they came at 10, punctual. our performance was at 11am....

green house cheer went first, all the other cheerleaders(other house) cheered for them. i didn't, cause i was basically too busy panic-ing n memorising my sequence. u do anything wrong ltr, u'll get cursed the whole year, that's the world of cheerleader. i dont blame them actually. yellow house was next, i was still too busy panic-ing.

"cool....relax....just do your best....u've been practicing for a long time, just do this like how u did during rehersal. " i told myself, then i stared at one of my fellow cheerleader n hugged her, i was shaking.

''.....pasukan sorak rumah biru!!!" i turned, kept my mind blank, forgot for an while about the pain in my musle n ran out with everybody else. near the middle, i actually started to relax, and enjoy this historicle moment. during the second fomation, where i was required to do bridge, from standing position in the middle was actually easy. but i was worried i couldn't do it last minute last night that i practiced my bridge for over 10 times. now i have problem with my muscle, it hurts to even laugh.

so when it was time for the second formation, i held my breath n just bend down, surprisingly, it didn't hurt, i even went a bit too down that my hand had to bend n push back up. everything else went smoothly.

we had high hopes cause every other cheerleader teams made mistakes. if we win cheer, blue will get the overall champion. red had 12 points more than blue, yello n green had 100+ points less than blue. so, our main competition now, is red.

when the time came for the results, all houses cheer are required to stand in the middle, under 1 o'clock sun, n wait for the pengetua to talk, the PIBG chairman to talk then they'll anounce the results. After that, the ketua scout will lead the 'sorakan' to end this event. which is 3 times of cheering ''hip hip hooray!!''

...........bla bla bla '' pemenang untuk pembarisan rumah ialah....rumah hijau!!!'' .........i could see red house commender crying, and our commender staring into space n at the trophy she thought she could finally hold....green house commender ran up, got the trophy and hugged and kiss and show it to all the members.

J said, i joined cheer since form 3, every year, we get last place, tis is my last year in this school...i really hope there's a change.....

B says, blue house is no loser, u guys r good, on year 19xx blue house won overall champion for 5 years in a row.....

''pemenang untuk pasukan sorak rumah ialah rumah............'' biru, biru, biru, biru......i could hear all of us praying....

''kuning!!!!!!!!'' yeah!!!!!!..............screams of delight was heared. we lost....again.....

red got the overall champion.

blue....got nothing........

the ketua scout in front raised his hands and said ''hip hip hooray!!'' i really felt like just putting everything down n just...go home....but my hands went up with everone else, but i din't say a word.

during the wilayah song again....tears rolled, i bit my lips, shut my eye n told myself. this isn't the way u should act, yellow won, u should b happy for them....the song ended. we went back, took a few shots. i spotted my mom n went home, leaving the happy teams behind. The rest of blue house was being a real sport by joining in red house to run the field after winning.

i always respected people with good sportsmenship, so, like someone once said...life goes on, no matter how dissapointed or depressed u r, u cant turn time. if the judges think yellow house was worth the trophy, then i sincerlly congratulate u.

updates ><

2008-04-06T17:15:00.000+08:00

as usual....tis post is late. BUT, i have a really good reason this time. i was grounded...basically for no reason ><.

1) well, we, becca me n noyako, finally started our long delayed chinese novel bout a few people with special abillities. which, thanks to me, is gonna be short >< they write like 6 pages for one chapter, i only manage to write 1 and a half >< BUT, i assure u, its going to b good^^. ( with our wild imaginations, how can it not turn out good? ) for the sneak peek, go rebecca's blog ^^

2)last friday, mr.lee, during chemistry lesson was teaching about i-forgot-what, but i think it had to do with chemicals larh xp, so he said he'll let us try the sodium+water experiment. it was so cool...but i seriously thought at first that each group was going to do an individual explosion then after class, the lab assistant took a piece of sodium from a bottle of oil n drip in a basin. I thought i was going to explode immidiately, like what u watch on movies, where the person like very yeng like tat walk away frm the direction of the explosion. but apparently, it din't turn out like that. the lab assistant put the piece of sodium in the basin of water in the middle oh the badminton court. nothing happened for the first few seconds, then, it suddenly flash in a yellow flame, (sodium floats on water) and started a sizzling sound. juz when u think nothing's gonna happen....BOOM!!!! it explodes, catching everybody offgaurd, causing lot of people to scream. (mostly girls) this continued for six times. on the third time, it exploded softly, but its pieces went flying all over, causing it to explode again. kinda like fireworks.

3) results out....i got top 10 [ =D ].....from the bottom.....argh.....this is bad. havent got top 10 from the bottom since...standard 1. at the most oso number 12, usually top 10, or 5......sad......huge impact

conclusion....sleep now, it's mornin, school tmr, need to b energized (is there such word?), main reason.... my eyebags r gettin worst >< have to sleep. Till then.

first term exams are now offcially....over

2008-03-28T01:48:00.000+08:00

exams are over, time for results...TT.....i'm dead.....

surprisingly, i knew how to do my add math, BUT, i was out of time. when teacher anounced there was 5 minutes left, i scanned through the paper.....OMG...there was 2 questions with 4 marks, another 2 questions with 5 marks and....1 question with 10 marks....which i haven't touch. ( cold sweat ) immediately, i did the 10 mark first, it was about drawing the graph, i only managed to finish completing the square, write the minimum point, simply sketch something and time was up.

i was quite disapointed, cause i actually knew how to do most of them, but tried to do the tougher ones which spent 15 minutes and got 0 marks for. my results came out, and...i passed, terribly, C6. sounds so pathetic, there are crazy ppl in my class how got 92, for add math. So, as i say, this class, has serious mental problems, they probably just escaped from tanjung rambutan...who knows? lol

then, there was math. which i quite enjoyed, except the significant figure part, forgotten totally. the i-dont-know-what-went-wrong-with-him teacher, marked diffrently for the same answer. some got correct and some got wrong. ermm, mister, this is a 4 marks each questions, and i am positive that my answers are correct, so please remark. Of course, it wont b fair to us whom he marked wrong when it's correct, and those who got wrong and he excidentally gave correct. But, who was willing to give up thier 4 marks and admit teacher marked wrongly by giving them correct? Basically, i cant do a thing except gatting a few other ppl's papers who had the same problem as mine to b remarked. Well, this would probably b my only A1 subject with 80 sumthin. Remember the crazy guy that got 92 marks for add math? he got 100 for math....betul-betul mental problem.

then....my english....sad....i din get A1....got A2, 70 something oni....so was my EST....also sad...ngam ngam get A1, also 70 something....the only two subjects i thought could pull me up, turn out to be no big deal....i was shocked actually, my EST got A1, cause i didn't finish on time, something happened during exam which took up half an hour of my exam time, so i blanked 3 questions, which total up to b 6 marks...

well, i dont know how did my other subjects did, but it's quite early in the mornin now, and i need to go to school in 4 hours time. So, that would b all for now.

p/s..sorry becca bout tis mornin, congrates on ur EST and BI though
..now that exams r over, the activities all rush in, it'll b busy

historical day...for the family^^

2008-03-16T11:55:00.000+08:00

actually this happened like....3 days ago? yeah, i posted this late, as usuall =p

so, what happened?? well....a bird in my house laid two eggs, and it hatched!!!! fyi, they r wild. ( juz a little history here^^, but it wont b as boring as our normal history....this bird is actually the fifth bird building a nest in out dunno call what plant, the third bird which laid it's egg, and the FIRST bird which hatched it's eggs =D [ supposingly second, but the first was eaten by stray cats TT ] ) i'd also like to add that, the first few, were sparrows, but this is a yellow 1!!! i mean, i dont usually see yellow birds in this area, so....

anyway, the day before yesterday, i was screaming and jumping away when it hatched. ( i checked the next every hour =P ) it was....not how i thought i would look like. it didn't had any fur, not like those comic books where first born birds are all furry and kawaii, and it was also kinda black n pink.

Every half an hour after it hatched, my younger brother n i, took turns peeking at it. It didn't of course change much, but it was fun. I mean, there is a living thing in your house, and it's growing at a pace that...u can actually see the whole process.

one week later, i checked, the featheres started growing but not complete. And the eye's opened!!! it's so cute, the two pair of black eye staring at u, sometimes screaming too. but i didn't dare to go too near when the mother/father bird was around.

Another week later, there was a perfect set of feathers. the mother bird didn't come back at nights to warm the birdlings anymore, they were too big, though it still came back to feed it. the next day...which was the fifteenth day since the eggs hatched, both the birds moved out to a nearby branch to sleep. my nothing-better-to-do brother used news paper to fan it. it was shocked, and tried flewing off, but nearly got itself squashed. Carefully, i picked it up, which was stiff due to the shock, and tried flying off again. my brother thought it was really fun to have a bird in your hands, and picked the other up...he was quite rough with it and didn't get a good hold of the bird. it flew to the neighbours house. i left the other in the nest, and tried to spot the 1 in my neighbours house. i was worried...the bird cant fly properly yet, and there are a lot of stray cats in this area....that bird in my neighbours house, is definately not as smart as tweedy.

Few minutes later, we (my whole family ) decided we cant do anything about it. after going in the house, a funny thing happened...my neighbour's son, creept out, and put the birdling in our house, hoping we didn't realise. Aparentlly, my neighbours thought the birds were dirty, and had adviced us before to shoo the bird away. We, thought it was fascinating, to see something grow day after day. So, when they left the bird in our house, we were actually overjoyed. We tried putting them ( the two birds ) safely in thier nest, but they keep flying off, in the end, for the sake of thier safety, we caught them and put them in a temporary cage. ( birds always fly to our house, so we always have a place to put them in for the night if they [ other birds ] are hurt. =D ).

my bro let it off, without telling me, he said something....suddenly, something came flowing through my mind...

how the mother bird come n feed it's young every few hours, with a grasshopper, worms, dunno-what fruit or something like that. it's actually disgusting to see a worm wriggling in the mother's (or father, i dunno who) beack, but after a while thinking....i....actually felt something.....both the mother and father bird took turns coming back with something for thier young, and stared at me when i'm near.(which makes it hard for me to photograph thier growing process) i suddenly thought of how hard is it for parents with kids (expecially since all three has thier own sets of problems) to raise thier...child? anyway...the bird was a fast forward version of how kids grow up. To begin with, the mother hatched the eggs for two whole weeks, after building the nest for another week, when the birds were juz born, they couldn't see anything...they thought, everyone who came near was not gonna hurt them, and innocently opened thier beacks to all, expecting u to feed it when i'm actually photographing it ( why am i the bad guy here? ) . then when the birds opened it's eye's, it started to understand that...the world is not that perfect...even if something came near, it doesnt mean it's gonna help ( or feed, in this case.. ) u , it's probably taking advantage ( or photo's, in this case also ) of u [which was y it started screaming at me when i came near ] , the parents could only see from far and couldn't do a thing. ( they cant like, fly over n peack me, rite? ) then...it's the teenage time, the feathers all grew, and it was ready to fly. it thought it flew well, and ended up nearly squashed under my mom's car tyres. ( lucky thing i spoted it before my mom drove in the porch ) at this time, the parents cant help anymore, the birds would have to face the world...with some help ( me!! i picked it up and put it back in the nest ) but it didn't appreciate whatever help given to it, it flew away from the nest, and nearly had it's legs squashed.....( again ) finally being in a cage for a whole night, it learnt to fly...properly...the mother bird tried to peack a way for it's young to come out....

so, at times....when u thought that u could handle things on your own and u dont need ur parents anymore or something happened between u guys n u think they dont care anymore, u r actually quite wrong...

the next morning, when my bro was sure it was save, no stray cats around, my bro let it off...the mother/father bird was near...i didn't have a chance to say my last goodbye's...i was in school at that time.....i could imagine though, the beutifull picture of the mother/father bird, flying off together with it's young...well grown...into the clear blue skies, leaving it's childhood ( birdlinghood? ) memories back here, for me to remember it by.....

it's actually 25 of march when it left.

p/s- i really miss them...wish they'll come back to visit sometimes after spending 16 days here

kerja amal

2008-02-28T20:37:00.000+08:00

This was actually quite unexpected, during recess on Tuesday, C suddenly asked me, '' Want to do kerja amal together or not? we r all going'' i wasn't sure whether i should go, cause i was actually planing to do my moral's kerja amal ( a really stupid, useless project by the way, but i have to admit, if it wasn't because of this project, i probably would never have know what was happening outside my small tiny fantasy world) with interact or prs club, but, well, who know what might happen right? for all u know, the teacher will suddenly ask us to pass up our project the next day....well, then i'm done for. So....i agreed.

i told my mom about this, she agreed too, and so, i found myself at this..i dont know wat place, which was for children with mental problem....( i thought this was suppose to b a trip to an orphanage?)

i went there, and was shocked to find out that....the things i do, the things WE ALL do everyday, which we think is based on common sense is actually NOT based on common sense to a child with those kind of problems. Firstly, i was shocked to find a boy eating rice...rice that isn't boiled( which i managed to stop), then i saw another boy, who went around with a bottle n hitting people with the bottle after pouring the water on people....ect....( i dont really want to continue)

Back to the main purpose we came here...we asked the 'kakak' in charged if there was anything we could do, she told us another group of ppl came a week ago, so the house is still quite clean....WHAT TO DO???? wat's going to happen to our kerja amal??? there's about 30 ppl here, wat photo's r we going to put in? so, we took photo's of us fakingly sweep the floor, wipe the gates...i didn't realy like the idea, so i took only 1 photo, just for the project's sake. (probably will do another REAL one later)

Later, after the photo taking, we tried comunicating with the kids. i managed to understand what one of them were trying to tell me. ( he was 19, but i thought he was younger than me ><) i asked him a few questions n heard a heart-breaking story. the way he told it, was like it was the most normal thing in the world...yet, it's....

he spoke to me in cantonese, i was curious as to where did he learn how to speak that language as the rest of the kids( erm, actually most r older than me but... ) there only understands malay. after a few attempts, i finally understood what he said. he goes home once a week..........what? he has a family, so why is he here?? i mean, y isn't his family member looking after him? y is he left here?? though i was speechless, i continued my conversation with him. he then continued, most of the kids here have families, but r left here till no-idea-when. though i understand that it could b hard for the parents of these kids to accept the fact that thier child turned out like that, but, the child is still thiers, even if they do sent thier child to places like this, thinking it would b for the best, the least they could do is to visit thier child more often....

some time later, as i was wandering around, i saw another little girl sitting near a table. i talked to her, but she only smilled sweetly at me without a word. when some of the boys informed me that they brought some colour pencils n papers for them to draw, i tried to get the little girl to go out with me outside, where all the other kids gathered to do colouring. i managed to get her to stand up, but she couldn't move, i didn't understand. suddenly, i saw what was holding her back. she was tied to the table by a rope on her right leg.

the 'kakak' explained that she'de run away if her legs were not tied up. the girl continue smilling at me....she had a sweet smile. i was reluctant to leave her behind alone even when everyone was asked to gather outside. WELL...something embarassing happened n my first reaction was to turn my head n immediately ran out. my face was flushed, n i thought i even had fever, i was so shocked i was actually crying.[i've never been that shock or embarrased in my life before to make my face so red ] my frens were laughing away when they knew wat happened ( so bad == ). later, after everyone gathered outside, one of the girls explained that we weren't suppose to go into the other part of the house (where i went just now)

as there was actually a girl there with hits anybody who goes near.

i was shocked to hear that. but becaused of what happened earlier, i sweared i was not going in there again. then the smilling face of the little girl floated past my mind again. i was so tempted to bring the little girl a pencil n paper to draw on, but....i didn't want to go back there. in the end, i managed to pull a friend to come along with me(who later ran off). the 'kakak' told me more bout the little girl while i drew pictures with her. it seems that her other few siblings has the same problem. except for the eldest sister, all of them has problems. but they r sent to different centres in the country. her parents are divorced. the father looks after the eldest sister n come to visit his child every year.......the little girl smiles at me again....at least, she looks happy......

i heard some noise, picked up my courage n walked further into the house. i saw the room, where the sound came from. it was a terrible sight...a girl was chained in metal chains n locked to the wall at the corner of the empty room. she spotted me, n did somthing i never immagined. she sang to me...i was tongue-tied. so i sat at the other corner of the room and listened. when i came back to my senses, i tried talking to her in every language i knew. she continued singing. i was actually shocked at the poor room conditions, i mean, if i was tied here n was asked to live the life she lived, even i would have gone crazy....the kakak heard her singing.

she came into the room and talked to me. apparently, tis girl was here for quite some time, meaning few years. she'd break the windows with nothing but her bare hand when she's in a bad mood. sometimes, she even breaks the metal chains on her legs and attack people. then the girl stopped singing. i tried to go a little nearer. the kakak didn't stop me, she only ask me to be careful.

i moved slowly. Suddenly, without warning, she pounced at me. i had no idea what happened, but i somehow managed to dodged the 'attack'. i was kinda shock myself, before i knew it, the second round of pounding came. this time, i not only dodged the 'attack', i raced to the door. still stunned, about what happened. ( i was quite shocked that i dodged that instead of my usual got attack oso dunno what happened situation, so....round of applause please =D )

the kakak actually laughed. she told me that it's ok edi, she cant go that far with the chain on her legs. (are u kidding me? she jumped from one end of the room to another, thats like 2 meters, and she could have jumped another 2 meters if it wasn't because of the chain. ><) so how'd u bring food for her, or where does she sleep, she can't sleep on the floor her whole life? i asked, masa makan, saya letak pinggan tu kat sana, dia mau makan, dia makan lah, masa tidur pun sama, saya letak tilam kat sana, dia akan tidur lepas letih... she answered calmly.

......shock.......

after everything's over, there was a mix feeling. i felt lucky that i'm born fine n considered healthy? but, i did feel sad for the unfortunate ones. i'm sure they didn't want things the way it is too, but they had no choice. i pity thier parents too. i mean, who wont b upset if thier child turn out like that? but even if it's difficult, they still have to take up some kind of responsible right? if they think by sending thier child here, they are doing all they can, fine...but at least come visit them or bring them home once in a while...they really need it....even if it doesn't look like they even know what's happening............

P/S..this blog was in draft since 28th of feb. ><

a happy day, turned out to b nothing more than pure sadness...

2008-02-17T18:03:00.000+08:00

this is actually really unexpected...i mean, my life had a lot more other really intresting things that happened these few days...but i never thought of posting it, u can say i forgot totally that i ever had a blog...maybe i'll post it all later...but something happened today, something that made posting it on blog came to me...unexpectedly, and immediately...looks like i didn't forget me having a blog totally...
well, today, is my friend's birthday, A. We all planed to go to ebox, in carefour to celebrate as midvalley was...(i cant remember the reason =p). So, C, H, and K were going, including me.( should i say that there were suppose to be more people going, but they didn't turn up) we wanted to surprise A , so we all pretended we forgot her birthday, and that H couldn't turn up. A was really upset, she was so dissapointed that we forgot her birthday and H wasn't coming... when i saw her upset look, i really really wanted tell her the whole truth, i couldn't bear to see her like that, but then, i cant spoil our perfect plan either, so when the time came, i did as planed n ask A to accompany me to the toilet. When we came back, H was there with the cake, we sang 'happy birthday' to the birthday girl. She was laughing and close to tears and i dont know what other emotions were there...well, THAT was the time the gang started to heat up.
we played till around 3pm, then we decided to play true or dare.
C got the first round of true, we asked tons of questions, then A got the second, also true. H got the third, also true. And then...what do u know, the stupid thing pointed at me.
They shoot me with questions like ' do u like J? ' 'was there anyone you ever hated?' ' were u always pretending?'
As for the first question, i was like...i thought i said that before? i do like J, as in admire, nothing more, why cant they understand the difference between love and like?
The third question came first, well, NO!!!!!! i mean, i was always like the way i am, (i might be noob or maybe...MAYBE a bit slow, but is there anything wrong with that?) just because not everyone is like that doesn't mean i MUST be pretending. The only time i DO pretend, is when i dont know how else to react, or that i'm in shock. I mean, why else would i do that?
Then came the second question. Well, yes...but hate is a strong word, i wouldn't say i hate, i'de probably say i dislike. Two years ago, there was this gang of people at the back who hated me, for no reason, which i now, just few hours ago, found out...was not hate, they were litterary toying me. So...guess how i felt?

That, wasn't what made me feel bad...that was the minor....

They later start whispering here n there about the reason, y i was choose to b toyed out of all the ppl in my class, i mean, why me? H knew the reasons perfectly well, she whispered to the others, and they all agreen, C even added, '' if i was said something like that by someone, i'll feel really bad..''

i'm determined to know...they all thought i couldn't accept it if they did tell me. I thought i could. But, you know what? they were right, i couldn't. I tried, but i couldn't.

Curious? Still intrested to continue reading?

Well, these were the few reasons H told me which they agreed...

1) your looks... ( #$3*^&*!!!!!!! )

k, now i'm better, i'll explain,

they say- cause u looked really 'funny' when u were in form 2....

i replyed- what? wats wrong with my hair?

they said- well, u know.....but dont worry, u look a lot better after u braced ur teeth....blah, blah, blah ( dun really wan to care bout it anymore, so, next)

2)your behaviour.... (what? i'm a bit crazy at times, jumps around when i get excited, a bit innocent, and slow to catch sth at time.....so? it's not illegal. [really really hate to admit it])

3)n lastly, u dont really take any action when bullied.... ( what?? how am i supposed take any action if i dont know anything? and how am i suppose to know anything if nobody tells me????? [still, i dont think i'll do anything, i mean, wad do u suppose me to do? beat them? i haven't done tat since....cant remember when] )

i was in a extreamly bad mood after that, but i managed to control. My friends could tell i wasn't taking it so well though

well, after the like 2nd song, SHE's 'chu dian' there was this very normal word, in a very normal sentance, that made me broke down. ( i wont say which word =x ) well, guessed what happened next? i put the microphone down, and hid my head in H's back, n cried like a baby...embarassing huh?

my frens didn't know what to do, or react, so they juz asked me to stop because it was making them feel bad for telling me. i knew it wasn't thier fault, but it still took some time before i recovered. i requested to take a few more group pictures, and i left.

i guess i'm the kind of abnormal person who can suddenly cry, and pretended nothing ever happened in 10 minutes ( if i want to, if i dont, the things i say can really really hurt someone, even if i dont talk, the whole situation will turn very stiff, because people know immediately if i' in a bad mood, which is why, i usually stay in my room with my phone switched off when i'm in one) my mom had absoulutely no idea anything like this ever happened. My elder brother, he was the one who sensed i was in a bad mood, so we went to the playground and talked it over...

so..............i'm perfectly fine now, and recieved 2, 3 messages from my frens who saw my personal message in my msn, which i changed immediately..........................

i think, that would b all. so, end of the story.

feel like crying

2007-11-26T22:25:00.000+08:00

...juz came back from tution....i feel terrible, like i did something real bad....but i didn't...

i dont know wats happening, i guess it was because i heard jq said that if i dont want the place in science stream...give it to her.....for the past three weeks, i knew, without anyone telling me, i suck in add math....but does that stop me from going into science strem? i love science....i'm mad, sad, dissapointed and upset and just feeling real down...

i'm dissapointed because my best fren, jq, didn't understand me enough to actually suggested that if i get the place in science stream n she didn't get it, give it to her...how could she say that?! i mean, she thought that i'de actually give up my chance to study in science stream juz because i'll suffer 4 my math??? if i was me 1 year ago, i would have, but not any more...sad to say, i can predict what will happen next to my frienship with her in the future....she changed, i changed...we are both in different classes, mixing different types of ppl who hate each others....there's no longer a topic that could make us sit down together and chat 4 hours...

i'm mad because of also what jq said, how could she b so unconfident about herself?? i mean since form 1 , my results has onli twice been a bit... than her's but still i NEVER NEVER EVER thought my results were beter than hers...she was alwas so hard working, studying when i was still asleep, cracking her head about math that i just trew one side....i had high hopes for her... though uncomfortable to most ppl, i always hoped she could get good results...she was most of the time the cherry 1, laughing in the face of trouble, gigling over and somehow past through it, i've often asked for her advice on stuff, she's more matured, and now, suddenly i realised that she ment what she said, she thought i could get into science stream, and thought she couldn't make it???? i might have, like what one of my friends told me, been proud of my ability to do ok in class without studying, i know that too, i also know that if i could work harder, i could do better, which is why she's one of my role models. to become more hard working.....

i'm upset because my math tution teacher has high hopes on me, and i dont like dissapointing ppl. bt i really cant understand whats happening....why does x have to bring over to the other side? why does the y suddenly become 2x?? all this questions swim in my head throughout the class, and though i tried asking, no teachers, till now understands what i ask in math....

so what do u get when mad+dissaponted+upset? sad, down....tears

i HATE math

2007-11-21T22:32:00.000+08:00

add math was as usuall, tough....during the whole lesson, i not only had to strugle to keep my eyes open( ok, tat part was probably my fault for sleeping only at 2 this mornin...=p) , but the worst thing is.........

I DONT UNDERSTAND A WORD THE TEACHER'S SAYING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

haiz...mayb i shouldn't take science stream after all....even if i do get into science stream....
n to think, there's still fiziks, chemistry, biology, modern math....
when will i, then, have time to spend time on computers???(main concern XD )

anyway, my dad knew about me creating a blog n wanted me to make full use of it.
how? u might ask.....
my dad wants me to write in info about our family trip to NZ three years ago.....(swt!!!)
three years....so i guess u could understand how shock i was.
He even wanted me to write about my trip singapore 2 years back n thailand trip during the June hols...
mayb i will, when i'm in a gd mood...
(wanna know the real reason? well, my dad had a friend who went to thailand every 3 months n put in all the info's in his blog, so when my dad asked him for his advice about the trip to thailand, he juz said-read my blog. my dad liked the way he put it.....n so, when he knew i had a blog.....)

am i an idiot?

2007-11-20T21:37:00.000+08:00

have u ever seen or heard of sum1 who actually makes a blog juz so tat she can post her comment?
i'll bet i'm the first...guess i'm either too emotional?n feels tat it's sth i have to do.
hey, but making m own blog makes me feel kinda proud of myself.
y? u might ask...well, tis is considered a rather sucess for a computer illiterate...T.T

though, personally, i did in fact have sum of my own reasons y i never thought of creating a blog.(never?)

1)my brother had once said tat once said tat once anything u put on blog is out, it's not a personal thing anymore, especially, for someone like me, who cant keep anything once i'm really mad n gets out of my mind, things might get out of hand. n so, i understood wat my bro mean.
2)there was once an article about internet flooding with blogs n ppl juz cant find the correct information.
i kinda agree. cause....sumtimes when there r assignments to do, n u have to find info's, typing it on the net is easy, but the reading part is a headache. u get pages n pages of anything tat has those words tat u typed in it n after reading, being dissapointed because those r not wat u want. the worst part is tat u stay up the hole night reading n reading n find nothing....make u, no mayb not u guys if u're used to these but it makes me feel like i want to cry...=p
3)the MOSt important one of all....my eyes....i hope to keep it in good condition till as long as possible. i mean ur eyes r going to be with u till the last days of ur life(how did i get here? y so negatif geh?) so i want to keep it in tip top condition...if possible. but frm wat i'm doing everyday now, during the hols, (reading comic on9, watching tv, dvd, youtube, anime's, n reading in the dark every moring[1-2am], spending time on coputers till early morning....ect...)is it even possible???

well, i'm not dicouraging u guys, i mean, since i have my own blog now....
it is i guess good to have a place to realease everything, bt not too much, cause, u dont know who's reading tis rite?

but, on the other hand, i guess it was also due to other causes,
my few other friends had for quite a while been naging me to create a blog...
but i guess i was juz plain lazy.